Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I have never tried drugs, but a friend recently saw a show on acid and LSD. It looks fun, but I am afraid that if I try it, I will like it too much and won’t be able to stop. Got any advice?
_B-Man
Dear B-Man,
Here’s my advice — don’t. LSD is a very potent substance. It is also illegal, and you would have to procure it from someone who is not exactly a licensed and responsible professional. You don’t know what the hell you’d be getting. There is no way to know if you will have a pleasant or terrible experience. Dr. Lovemonkey has taken a wide variety of drugs, both legal and illegal, but he is positively scared of LSD.
Get a conscience
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I am 42 and have been married for 12 years to a wonderful man, but there is someone at work to whom I am attracted. He kissed me one day when we were alone, and I realized how sexually attracted I was to him. We are both married and don’t plan to divorce. I have been quietly fooling around with this man for more than a year, but we have not had sex. I have certainly tried. We kiss and grind. I have even given him oral play. He keeps promising that we will have sex soon. Why hasn’t he gone to the next step? What is the problem, and why won’t he share some sex with me?
_Tired of Waiting
Dear Tired,
I don’t know the answer to your question, but I’ll take an educated guess and say that your co-worker is dealing with some guilt about his extra-curricular (extra-marital) involvement with you. I’m a bit surprised that you don’t feel the same way. I don’t advocate guilt as a good thing, but the path you are on could cause great damage to one or both of your marriages. Stop fooling around and go back to being platonic co-workers before you both regret it.
Don’t suck it up
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I have been seeing this man (he’s 39) since April. We started out having sex, but he has backed off. We have lived in the same house for two months. He says he does not want a relationship with anyone, but he will ask for blowjobs. When I ask for something, he says no. He told me yesterday that he loves me, but is not in love with me. My question is, will he ever be in love with me? And what is he doing? What do you think?
_B.L. from Warwick
Dear B.L.,
He’s trying to convince you to offer free blowjobs without any sort of responsibility or commitment on his part. When someone tells you that they love you, but are not in love with you, the best response is usually to walk away real fast. When someone says this to you and then asks if you’d be interested in blowing him, you should tell him to pony up for a prostitute. Stop blowing this guy -- he’s using you.
Email the author
Dr. Lovemonkey: rudycheeks@prodigy.net.
