Dream on
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I'd like my marriage to be more like a "fairy tale." How can I do that?
Linda from Chepachet
Dear Linda,
It may be risky, but consider hanging around local ponds and looking for the biggest, ugliest frog that you can find. As you probably know, kissing the frog will sometimes convert the frog into a prince. You do run the risk of merely getting a mouthful of wet and mossy bad taste but it's definitely worth it. After achieving the frog/prince transformation, make plans to find a good spot to house a horse at your place, since a fairy tale prince is nothing without a horse. There are a number of other medieval elements that you'll want to look into -- poison apples, baking children into pies, hanging around with gnomes, etc. But if you do not wish to be run out of your neighborhood (if you are, insist on tar and feathers), it might be best that you refrain from your "fairy tale" longings.
Improper advance
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I've been going out with "Joe" for almost a year. We are both and focused strongly on our careers. Because of that, this is not an intense relationship. We both believe it is okay to see other people. This works for us. Anyway, I was out at a bar about a month ago, and ran into one of Joe's friends. We had some drinks and he offered to walk me home. On the way, he made several passes at me, and I let it be known that I wasn't interested. This did not deter him. He was getting close to groping me, and I had to push him away. He finally relented. I've seen him since then and nothing weird has transpired, but I'm still a little upset about that evening. I assume it was the alcohol that set this in motion. I've thought of telling Joe about this little episode, but I fear he might take a swing at his friend. Should I say anything to Joe or just let it pass?
Uncertain Woman
Dear Uncertain,
It would be a very good idea to lay the whole thing out for "Joe." His friend appears to have an alcohol problem but, worse, he is a potential rapist. You should tell Joe that you think his friend needs help (as opposed to a sock in the jaw). That he would so aggressively force himself on someone is very serious. You would be doing this guy (and everyone else who might come into contact with him) a big favor by encouraging him to seek help. Domestic violence remains a gigantic problem in our culture, and we all need to do more to confront it. Alcohol or no alcohol, this is a serious situation.
Mixed identity
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I'm a gay man, 23, in my first year in graduate school. There's another man studying in the same discipline with me, and we've become quite friendly. In fact, he's funny, he's talented, and he's cute. On the other hand, he's married with a young child. We haven't done anything, but he is displaying a lot of affection and interest. I am a bit confused, because it has been him coming on to me. Ordinarily, when I see blatant signs off heterosexuality, I immediately write off that guy. I'm not sure what to do.
Bob
