The Phoenix Network:
 
 
About  |  Advertise
Adult  |  Moonsigns  |  Band Guide  |  Blogs  |  In Pictures
 
Features  |  Reviews
FIND MOVIES
Find a Movie
Movie List
Loading ...
or
Find Theaters and Movie Times
or
Search Movies

The Marine

John Cena is no Arnold
By TOM MEEK  |  October 18, 2006
1.0 1.0 Stars

WWE main attraction and Massachusetts native John Cena makes his movie debut in this jerky Commando-esque knockoff. Unlike the current governor of California, however, Cena doesn’t know he can’t act. Arnold punched out the awful dialogue with campy irony. Cena plays a jarhead named — get ready for it — John who’s a military lifer but gets discharged after impromptu heroics violate orders. He flounders in the real world until a well-groomed psychopath (Robert Patrick playing it loose) steals $12 million in diamonds, blows up half of South Carolina, and abducts John’s wife (Kelly Carlson, ever perfectly primped, even in the midst of a firefight). Issues of race and pedophilia oddly percolate, and director John Bonito convolutes the formulaic mayhem by concocting action sequences that make no logical sense whatsoever.

On the Web
The Marine's Web site: http://www.themarinemovie.com/

Related: Eyes for others, Freudian trip, Art wars, More more >
  Topics: Reviews , Sports, Professional Wrestling, John Cena,  More more >
  • Share:
  • Share this entry with Facebook
  • Share this entry with Digg
  • Share this entry with Delicious
  • RSS feed
  • Email this article to a friend
  • Print this article
Comments
The Marine
he look fine inthis movie good job john
By teenfrog on 11/09/2006 at 5:38:41

More Information
ARTICLES BY TOM MEEK
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   REVIEW: NINJA ASSASSIN  |  November 25, 2009
    So much blood splashes across the screen in James McTeigue’s martial-arts madness, you’d think the human body consisted of nothing but.
  •   CANNONBALL QUIETS HARVARD QUAD  |  November 04, 2009
    It’s been awhile since we had to worry about the multi-colored national danger spectrum, but last week, the northwestern quadrant of Harvard Square was put on high alert.
  •   REVIEW: WARREN MILLER'S DYNASTY  |  November 04, 2009
    How many death-defying stunts can one behold before they become repetitious? Quite a few, it would seem.
  •   REVIEW: SAW VI  |  October 30, 2009
    Jigsaw (Tobin Bell), the self-righteous serial killer of the long-toothed franchise, may have succumbed to cancer a few films back, but he remains very much alive in plot and presence.
  •   REVIEW: MOTHERHOOD  |  October 22, 2009
    Being a mother can be stressful.

 See all articles by: TOM MEEK

MOST POPULAR
RSS Feed of for the most popular articles
 Most Viewed   Most Emailed 



  |  Sign In  |  Register
 
thePhoenix.com:
Phoenix Media/Communications Group:
TODAY'S FEATURED ADVERTISERS
Copyright © 2009 The Phoenix Media/Communications Group