As for new musical instruments: zero invented in 2008. Pathetic. No orgasm whistle, either, even though that was pretty much the best idea ever. I got my hopes up when I saw a dude in the park blowing into a shiny, hook-shaped thing with tons of buttons that made the most gloriously seductive tones, but I asked him about it and apparently it's called a "saxophone" and it's been around for ages already.
(Big Hurt trivia: There have been at least five Top 40 singles featuring the otherworldly sounds of the "saxophone." Can you name them?)
After reading up on this instrument, I'm definitely into it, so why not innovate on this thing? For example, you know how they have those double-necked guitars to cram in twice the blazin' notes and distract from the Cheap Trick guy's face? The same principle could be applied to the saxophone: blowing into one nozzle makes saxophone noises, and the other nozzle goes into a Frampton-style spit-tube thing, so you can make it sing words! Or, if you're cheaper, you can just put a microphone into the sound-hole and do a kazoo thing. Now you don't even need Auto-Tune, because the saxophone does all the work — you're basically a one-man band, which means more royalties and no more having to double up on chicks.
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Music Features
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