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Big Hurt

The Big Hurt: Hagar the horrible

Plus award-winning awards and buggering Beatles
I was reading a fascinating article about Sammy’s new record deal, and an epiphany struck: every year, Sammy looks more and more like the Dude.

By: DAVID THORPE | September 24, 2008

The Big Hurt: Deepest sympathies

Our heartfelt condolences to Usher, Sammy Hagar, Courtney Love, and the Verve
One writer to another, I offer Mr. Portnow some freebies he can use to wrap up his next few releases.

By: DAVID THORPE | September 08, 2008

The Big Hurt: Confessions of a band namer

The music industry’s best-kept secret speaks out
Maybe you’ve never heard the name Harold Wells, but it’s a safe bet that you’re a fan of his handiwork.

By: DAVID THORPE | September 02, 2008

The Big Hurt: Earnest goes to camp

Plus baby comes from Clay and Bizkit defects to Manson
Hey: when the Verve play shows in America, they should start out their set with a cover of “The Freshman,” just so everyone’s like, “Wait a minute, I thought I had this shit figured out.”

By: DAVID THORPE | August 26, 2008

The Big Hurt: Reconstructive criticism

How music can be better
The job of any great music critic (e.g., me) is to provide useful suggestions to musicians, thus advancing the art.

By: DAVID THORPE | August 19, 2008

The Big Hurt: More bad news in brief

DMX spits, Lou spills, Kelly leaks, Keane sucks
Police pulled over Snoop Dogg’s tour bus and — gasp! — smelled marijuana!

By: DAVID THORPE | August 13, 2008

The Big Hurt: Playing with fire

Lil Wayne runs afoul of the ABKCO juggernaut
Milli-selling rapgoblin Lil Wayne probably didn’t worry too much about borrowing the Rolling Stones’ “Play with Fire” for the hook of his track “Playing with Fire.”

By: DAVID THORPE | August 05, 2008

The Big Hurt: Winners and losers

A hip-hop scorecard
Jay-Z's headlining slot at the Glastonbury Festival June 28 has been the stuff of much controversy, with various artists weighing in on his suitability to the event.

By: DAVID THORPE | July 07, 2008

The Big Hurt: Pied-pipers lead innocent teens to emo cult Valhalla!

Music news in brief
As a connoisseur and frequent purveyor of shitty journalism, I have to applaud the Mail for its tremendous gusto.

By: DAVID THORPE | June 02, 2008

The Big Hurt: Tragic kingdom

Hard Rock Park about as awesome as it sounds
The whole Hard Rock enterprise — which started as a café and has since branched out into hotels, casinos, and a vast nationwide network of lame T-shirts — has built great success on the idea of “rock.”

By: DAVID THORPE | May 20, 2008

The Big Hurt: Here come the summer fests

‘Excellent entertainment-value propositions’ for all!
Look alive, alt-metal fans. Time to polish the wallet chain, spray some Febreze on the ol’ cargo shorts, and dye your goatee purple for maximum extremeness: festival season is nearly upon us!

By: DAVID THORPE | May 07, 2008

The Big Hurt: Beef in brief

Guess whose guess-what is as raggedy as a mango seed
Ultra-classy rapper Khia, best known for urging America’s ladies to pop their anatomies and America’s men to lick her “crack,” is fixing to put me out of a job.

By: DAVID THORPE | April 30, 2008

The Big Hurt: Chinese Democracy at last!

Why you should consider not caring
Reports have surfaced that Chinese Democracy , the long-awaited album by former rock gods Guns N’ Roses, has been completed and delivered to Geffen.

By: DAVID THORPE | April 22, 2008

The big hurt: Music news in brief

Wal-Mart wanes, Satan wins, Weiland whines
Those of us still chuckling over DMX's “your momma ain’t name you no damn Barack” diatribe are in for another dose of ill-informed rapper cuteness.

By: DAVID THORPE | April 15, 2008

The Big Hurt: Clubbing baby seals: not okay

This week in social activism
Pop icon RICKY MARTIN paid a humanitarian visit to Cambodia recently in support of victims of sexual exploitation and human trafficking.

By: DAVID THORPE | April 08, 2008

The Big Hurt: Jammin’ with Nordstrom

Living guy sells out; dead guy sells out; living guys die
“I am stoked to collaborate with Nordstrom,” said Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz in a recent press release.

By: DAVID THORPE | April 01, 2008

The Big Hurt: Neglected press-release roundup

Music news that only a publicist could love
Nothing shakes off the doldrums like a short vacation to the bottom of the press-release barrel.

By: DAVID THORPE | March 24, 2008

The Big Hurt: This week in free stuff

A sharp decline in the value of music?
In yet another blow to the traditional record industry, the Charlatans UK have released their new album, You Cross My Path , as a free download.

By: DAVID THORPE | March 21, 2008

The Big Hurt: Fire sales

Plus, this week in tedious headlines
The world’s largest collection of recorded music has gone up for auction on eBay with a starting bid of $3 million.

By: DAVID THORPE | March 04, 2008

The Big Hurt: ‘Dream on no longer’

God sends Aerosmith to Activision
I’m going to assume that pondering the social impact of games like Rock Band and Guitar Hero is pretty well-trodden critical territory by now.

By: DAVID THORPE | February 26, 2008

The big hurt: Hello, goodbye

And a warm hello to STP, Britney, and Lily Allen
I should probably explain that this is not the same David Thorpe who recently resigned from a different local newspaper where he wrote a beloved weekly column very, very much like this one.

By: DAVID THORPE | February 20, 2008

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