Hire us now, Ms. Gist!

Will tap dance for free!
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  May 26, 2010


Wow! Bow-wow! How do we get a job to write a speech for state education commissioner Deborah Gist for a cool $10,000?

There is much to be liked about the new education top gal, with her funky streaky coif and brass ovaries. But blowing big money on a speech, even if it was donated for that purpose, is just a bit much. The excuses for this just don’t wash for any number of reasons. (List them, would you please, P+J?)

First off, Phillipe has a bit of an insider’s view since he was formerly a consultant to Gist’s predecessor, Peter McWalters, one of the best educators in the US and a total hot shit. Had P. suggested he get ten thou for writing a speech, that would have led to Mr. McWalters informing him that until the effects of the Red Bull, Ecstasy, and LSD had worn off, he should just stay home.

Second, Ms. Gist has an excellent writer and published author, Elliot Krieger, as her own p.r. honcho. He could crank out a stemwinder in about two hours, even if his computer crashed halfway through the exercise. Her explanation was that her entire staff was occupied with filling out the “Race to the Top” application for school funding. For those of you who have had to meet a deadline no mat-ter what the cost, that pony don’t ride.

Finally, if you are a true leader, you might have a few ideas of your own to put down in writing, rather than relying on an out-of-state hack to craft a speech for you. Anyone who can’t crank out a 10-page oratory without needing help with the big words might look for a job where the extent of conversation is, “Would you like fries with that?”

So while we wish you well, Deb, next time you have $10,000 extra in your pocket, please give Casa Diablo a call. We will throw in the tap dancing for free.

Phillipe and Jorge are big fans of Channel 10, and not just because Patrice Wood gives us free back rubs every week. Actually P. still has direct ties to the station, and your superior correspondents once did a show on WJAR called “Look Who’s Talking,” which should have cost station head Lisa Churchville her job, as we were constantly edited down or outright omitted after suggesting things like the de-portation of Salty Brine. Evidently they didn’t get our sense of humor.

Now we hear that after some lean years, WJAR is bulking up its staff once again, after WPRI has made ratings inroads. P+J are led to believe that a familiar media talking head will soon be brought in to be managing editor, with strong support from the current staff. This will be a big boost, as the JARheads had previously lost two ace news folks, Betty Jo Cugini and Jim Martin, for various reasons — leaving only our pal Artie Tefft, who is now the dean of newsroom power players in the Biggest Little, to fend for himself.

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