HOMEY Pauly D.
Oh, c'mon, you can't bullshit the bullshitters.

Yes, we speak of you, dear readers. P&J know that no matter what you've said about Jersey Shore — despite your claims that you have never watched that brain- and soul-draining tripe — there isn't a chance in hell you won't be glued to the tube on Thursday night at 10:30 to watch the most anticipated show of the season, at least in these parts, or anywhere else the average IQ of the population is in single digits. I write, of course, of Jersey Shore spin-off The Pauly D Project, featuring Johnston's own Paul DelVecchio.

With Snooki pregnant with a baby every obstetrician in the world is waiting with bated breath to behold, and The Situation in rehab for name-it-and-claim-it, it is left to Pauly D to carry the Jersey Shore guido banner.

To his credit, Pauly has managed to be the upstanding member — the brains, even — of that oil-oozing, Jagermeister-swilling crew. But with the bar so low for that honor it makes the limbo look like a high jump competition, we don't know if that qualifies as a compliment.

Let's face it, what more could you ask for? Flattering shots of the Biggest Little, mixed in with Pauly and his posse of mooks taking on Las Vegas, where he'll have to ante up on his normal bling-bling and double down on the personal destruction to even draw a sideways glance? How can you not love it already, sight unseen?

We would give Pauly D a rub on the head for good luck as he launches his new "project," but the prospect of having our hands forever stuck to whatever combination of STP, Krazy Glue, and last night's gravy he uses on his nouveau "Eraserhead" coif may leave P&J to offer an encouraging "break a leg" instead.

Then again, that could be misinterpreted by his pumped-up entourage, so let's just say "good luck to you, homey." Given his normally courteous deportment amidst the contrived Jersey Shore mayhem, it really couldn't happen to a nicer guy, and we have faith in Pauly D that he will do his Vo Dilun roots proud.

Over-under action on how many weeks it takes the Bud-I to horn in on the action with some sort of a cameo is three.


Phillipe and Jorge are always astounded by the pace of technological advance in our time. To wit: the recent surgery on the loathsome Dick "The Rifleman" Cheney, wherein doctors were able to replace the heart of a pig with a human one.


On Saturday, P&J attended a show at the German-American Cultural Society in Pawtucket (popularly know as the German Club) called "Sex Bombe: A Burlesk tribute to Marlene Dietrich."

There was a traditional German meal served in the building's Ratskeller followed by the show upstairs in the main hall, featuring a fabulous troupe of burlesque performers (including the great Bettysioux Tailor, who frequently graces the stage at AS220's Empire Revue), the mentalist Rory Raven, and musical numbers associated with Dietrich performed by the magnificent Miss Wensday.

1  |  2  |   next >
Related: Obama's year two to-do's, Nudity throughout history, Hire us now, Ms. Gist!, More more >
  Topics: Phillipe And Jorge , Jersey Shore, Pauly D
| More

Most Popular
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   THE ONE-THIRD MAJORITY  |  July 16, 2014
    The entrance of former mayor Buddy “Vincent A.” Cianci into the Providence mayoral campaign has claimed its first casualty.
  •   THE LOYAL (NON-)OPPOSITION  |  July 09, 2014
    While the vox populi screams, “Throw the bastards out!” it seems that approximately four in 10 candidates for House and Senate will have a free pass to return to the scene of the (multiple) crimes in 2015.
  •   GINA DIVES IN  |  July 02, 2014
    General Treasurer Gina Raimondo definitely stole a march on Providence Mayor Angel Taveras on his own turf at the opening of the Davey Lopes Recreation Center pool.
  •   WELCOME BAQ!  |  June 25, 2014
    Phillipe and Jorge spent the weekend lolling around Casa Diablo in our Iraqi Army fatigues.
  •   LONG-DISTANCE TRIBUTE  |  June 18, 2014
    P&J were saddened to hear about the passing of Casey Kasem, the famed radio jock (and TV host) who gave us the 'America’s Top 40' countdown show.

 See all articles by: PHILLIPE AND JORGE