No, we suspect that Big East legends Marvin Barnes, Patrick Ewing, Ed Pinckney, Walter Berry, Alonzo Mourning, and Allen Iverson did not complete their ecclesiastical studies before hitting the hardwood. For years, the few black "students" you could find on the PC campus just happened to play basketball.

At least another "religious" (read "cult") school, Brigham Young, draws its players from its Mormon base — although that base now seems to include seven-foot players from around the globe who evidently found God after BYU missionaries put guns to their heads and handed them airline tickets and four-year scholarships.


BOARD GAMES

We imagine that some of you have been following the story about the dumbass legislation recently introduced at Halitosis Hall in the name of the state's board of elections, which hadn't actually reviewed the proposals.

The board has since asked the General Assembly to disregard the bills. But P&J, like the rest of you, are wondering how such a mighty blunder could have occurred in the first place.

Since we were totally unsuccessful at prying any information from our friend Susan "Muffy" Farmer, who serves on the board (we knew we'd be unsuccessful, but it was a good excuse to call her and ask how she was doing), we have to speculate as to what exactly happened. This, as former BeloJo political columnist M. Charles Bakst always said, is how P&J work best: "You guys just make it up."

What we figure is that, since there are no elections going on, the staff over at the Board of Elections doesn't have a whole lot to do. So after the third run to Dunkin' Donuts one day, somebody came up with an excellent idea: why not introduce some really bad legislation and send it over to a Halitosis Hall gang always interested in such things?

Although not privy to the minutes of Monday's closed board meeting on the subject, we imagine the hard word was that the staff will just have to sit around and play board games rather than formulate new legislation.


GLORIOUS FOOD

Longtime Providence Phoenix restaurant reviewer Bill Rodriguez has created a web site, foodismywife.com, that is, in Bill's words, "dedicated to the proposition that the experience of food can be as much fun as sex. (And as wholesome, if you're not a slut about it)."

There are quotes from food celebrities, historical tidbits (in case you want to know where buffalo wings or Nutella come from), vintage clips of Julia Child dropping food on her PBS television show and, of course, a link to all of Bill's Vo Dilun restaurant reviews from the Phoenix (a very useful tool if you're going out to eat).

Your superior correspondents highly recommend that you take a look at the site. Bon appetit!


THE RETURN OF STEVIE THUNDER

On March 16, on the One O'Clock radio show from 6 to 9 am on WRIU (90.3 on your FM dial), host Cyber Larsen will have Stevie Thunder on as his special guest. Stevie, a Pawtucket native and URI grad, once hosted his own radio show on WRIU, "The Stevie Thunder Bad Taste and Immaturity Hour." Stevie was also a founding member of The Fabulous Motels and the owner/operator of the groundbreaking landscaping firm Acme Zen Gardens.

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