Easy Ed couldn’t tell us what that “one publication” was because, even though he regularly flogs the evils of one-party rule at Halitosis Hall, acknowledging the presence of another Providence-based newspaper — even one that he paraphrases (that pesky little Phoenix) — wouldn’t pass muster with the Fountain Street Politburo. And though Ed describes the Citizens Foundation of Rhode Island as “newish,” the Phoenix was reporting on it almost a year ago.
In the same vein, it would have been more big-minded for the Other Paper to deign to note, in their big bang piece on secretary of state hopeful Ralph Mollis receiving campaign contributions from a recently deceased mob associate, that Channel 10 investigative JARhead Jim Taricani had broken the story two days earlier.
But that’s why we love you, BeloJo. Unlike the claim of that mind-numbing advertising mantra, you give us single vision.
Rat tracks
In Indonesia, they call a shortcut “jalan tikkus.” This translates literally to “rat track” or “rat road.”
Well, it appears that the good folks from Jamestown 2007 (the Virginia Jamestown, not our own Jimmytown, home of Beavertail and the Narragansett Café) are kinda into the rat’s road as well.
The 17th-century replica ship, the Godspeed (the original helped bring settlers to Jamestown, Virginia) was docked at the Newport Yachting Center and offered up, according to organizers, “the story of the journey that changed the world and the nation’s birthplace, Jamestown, Virginia, [for] hundreds of thousands of visitors who will have a glimpse into early 17th-century America and the legacies on which our nation was founded.”
It is the sixth and final stop in the replica ship’s 80-day tour of six East Coast cities. The charming and beautiful Aunt B. recently took her favorite nephew, John, who was visiting Little Rhody from Pittsburgh, down to the Godspeed to take a “virtual voyage” aboard the historic ship via on-shore motion simulator. It was a very intriguing-sounding event, without doubt.
Well, “intriguing” turned out to be more bizarre than anything else. According to Aunt B. and John, the “virtual voyage” was in the form of a rat’s-eye view of the ship and the trip, which our friends say were both tremendously weird. And, to put it politely, they said it “sucked.” Hey, c’mon, doesn’t everyone think water rats are cute, cuddly little creatures, not to mention good bunkmates for a four-month passage, as they tried to gnaw off your fingers and toes while you slept?
P&J suggest that the Godspeed’s Jamestown 2007 honchos take a “jalan tikkus” to the nearest media consultants for some advice. “Willard Goes to Jamestown,” after all, might not exactly set any records for audience appreciation. Thank all gods they landed at the Southern version of J-Town.
Jockular
As huge fans of soccer and the HBO series Deadwood, we were delighted to learn through Sports Illustrated that Harry, the father of Deadwood star Ian McShane, played for England’s Manchester United in the 1950s. Man. U. is the New York Yankees of British soccer, and McShane’s father was not only a “classic Scottish left winger,” according to his son, he also ended up as a public address announcer for United. In his SI interview, McShane reverted to the persona of his Deadwood character, Al Swearengen, saying of the recent World Cup, “The wonderful thing about the World Cup is you get to be xenophobic for the month: F--- the Portuguese. I hate the f------ French. And I loathe the Italians, but they do look better than anyone else, don’t they? They have the best [uniforms]. I think they’re designed by Armani.”
