The Phoenix Network:
 
 
About  |  Advertise
Adult  |  Moonsigns  |  Band Guide  |  Blogs  |  In Pictures
 
Media -- Dont Quote Me  |  News Features  |  Talking Politics  |  This Just In

Dollar Bill-ed

Senator Alves comes under scrutiny
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  October 3, 2007

Phillipe + Jorge are surprised and sad to see that state Senator Stephen Alves of West Warwick is being investigated by the FBI for stuff involving his powers as chairman of the Senate Finance Committee.
 
The question, according to a report by Mike Stanton in the Sunday BeloJo, is whether Stevie killed a tax incentive for Duie Pyle, a Pennsylvania trucking company looking to expand into Johnston, because he was cross with Johnston mayor Joe Polisena over Polisena’s choice of investment advisers.
 
P+J might not be lawyers — although we do own matching trench coats — but we might offer these bits of wisdom to legislators: 1) Don’t mess around with a business deal, fully endorsed by the governor and the state Economic Development Corporation, to bring much-needed jobs to the state; and 2) Don’t say to the trucking firm lobbyist (as the lobbyist told Stanton) that “Polisena screwed me” on the pension deal in question. You’re welcome.
 
Alves appears to be the newest target of the federal Operation Dollar Bill investigation of possible illicit deals at the State House. House Speaker Bill Murphy, another of West Wark’s Smith Hill delegation, has evidently served as Alves’s lawyer for at least a little while, according to a remark by JAR-head Bill Rappleye during this past Sunday’s 10 News Conference.
 
Perhaps Senator Alves might ask former Senate President Billy “Little Napoleon” Iron out for cocktails to celebrate. We would recommend the Halitosis Hall martini, shaken in its boots.

Trouser snake rumba, Cambodian-style
P+J always loved the Humble Pie song, “One-eyed Trouser-Snake Rumba,” with the obvious allusion. Certainly, the late Stevie Marriott and the boys would greatly enjoy the below story, from the Web site of the Bangkok Post, courtesy of faithful reader David Varone.

Trouser snake kills Cambodian man
Phnom Penh (dpa) — A Cambodian man who took off his trousers, tied the legs at the bottom and wrangled a 2-metre cobra into them died when it bit him through the fabric, local media reported Monday.
  
Khmer-language daily Koh Santepheap quoted police as saying Chab Kear, 36, saw the reptile swimming in a river just outside the capital last Thursday during a drinking session and captured it in the hopes of selling it later in the day. He tied the animal inside his trousers and a scarf around his waist, but as he continued carousing the enraged snake managed to get its fangs free and bite Kear three times on the stomach.

  
The newspaper reported Kear’s last words as being “don’t worry — it’s nothing a drink can't fix” before he succumbed to the cobra’s venom.

Yep, one more drink and they’ll be some dramas inside your pajamas tonight. Shine on.

1  |  2  |  3  |   next >
Related: Beating around the Bush, Hillary-ization strikes US, Take a sad song and make it better, More more >
  Topics: Phillipe And Jorge , U.S. Government, U.S. State Government, Halitosis Hall,  More more >
  • Share:
  • Share this entry with Facebook
  • Share this entry with Digg
  • Share this entry with Delicious
  • RSS feed
  • Email this article to a friend
  • Print this article
Comments

Today's Event Picks
ARTICLES BY PHILLIPE AND JORGE
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   PAGING QUEEQUEG  |  November 25, 2009
    Like Captain Ahab with Moby-Dick, it appears Providence Bishop Tommy Tobin has his own obsession with Rep. Patrick Kennedy.
  •   GOVERNOR GHOUL  |  November 18, 2009
    Phillipe and Jorge are coming late to this fight, as last week’s column was already filed when the announcement was made that Governor Donald Carcieri — Governor Ghoul to you — had vetoed a bill giving domestic partners the right to claim the bodies of and make funeral arrangements for the people with whom they shared their lives.
  •   EASY ED STRIKES AGAIN  |  November 11, 2009
    It’s always easy for Ed. That’s “Easy Ed” Achorn, the Other Paper’s deputy editorial pages editor who is the equivalent of a right-wing P&J.
  •   PAGING DILBERT  |  November 04, 2009
    What’s black and white and re(a)d all over? Certainly not the Providence Urinal, whose circulation has been falling faster than a 1000-pound safe pushed out of a sky-scraper window.
  •   JUDGING THE JUDGE  |  October 28, 2009
    After reading Sunday’s front page BeloJo story, “Support for R.I. Judge not unanimous,” your superior correspondents have to suspect that everything — absolutely everything — is thoroughly politicized.

 See all articles by: PHILLIPE AND JORGE

MOST POPULAR
RSS Feed of for the most popular articles
 Most Viewed   Most Emailed 



  |  Sign In  |  Register
 
thePhoenix.com:
Phoenix Media/Communications Group:
TODAY'S FEATURED ADVERTISERS
Copyright © 2009 The Phoenix Media/Communications Group