2008 LEADER BOARD
TONY ZENDEJAS (EX-RAMS) | drugging a woman, then raping her when she's unconscious | 95
CEDRIC EVERSON AND ABE SATTERFIELD (EX-IOWA) | rape of an incapacitated person | 90
JIM LEYRITZ (EX-YANKEES) | DUI manslaughter | 90
BRADY SMITH (EX-BC) | being a drunken slob of a would-be rapist | 89
BRANDAN WRIGHT (EX-BETHUNE-COOKMAN) | running dude over with an Isuzu for owing him $200 | 89
RYDELL WOODS (EX-AKRON) | shooting at cops; getting caught with five guns and ski masks | 88
JEROME MATHIS (TEXANS) | choking pregnant babymama | 75
BRANDON MARSHALL (BRONCOS) | the old repeatedly-hitting-women thing | 70
FABIAN WASHINGTON (RAIDERS) | red marks on girlfriend's neck | 70
AHMAD BROOKS (BENGALS) | punching chick in front of her kids, the asshole | 60
CARL ELLER (EX-VIKINGS) | assault, terrorist threats, being a generally dangerous old geezer, driving a motorcycle with busted plates | 60
JAMES HARRISON (STEELERS) | punching girlfriend to facilitate a baptism | 60
ANDY CHRISTENSEN (NEBRASKA) | wantonly grabbing unguarded vagina in bar | 55
JEREMY ELDER (EX-ALABAMA) | late-night stickup | 55
CEDRIC WILSON (STEELERS) | punching girlfriend, but not in order to facilitate a baptism | 55
ADAM JONES (COWBOYS) | being a menace to peaceful strip-club patrons everywhere | 50
MAURICE SIMMONS (USC) | being the wheelman for a Compton armed mugging | 50
MIKE TYSON (BOXER) | murder for hire, possibly? | 50
SHAWNE WILLIAMS (PACERS) | harboring an accused first-degree murderer | 50
JOHN STEPHENS (EX-PATRIOTS) | sex-assault fugitive | 48
DAVID CORNACCHIA (FLA. EVERBLADES) | mid-flight assault, head-butting bystanders, exposing wine-shrunken wiener | 46
KEITH MCCANTS (EX-ALABAMA) | getting Tasered after hurling pliers and crack pipe at cops | 43
BRANDON PETTIGREW (OKLAHOMA STATE) | elbowing Stillwater's finest | 42
DAMEON MARK-KEITH SMITH (MARSHALL) | two counts of credit-card theft, having too many names | 42
RIAR GEER (COLORADO) | randomly assaulting two students, being an asshole | 40
JOSH JARBOE (OKLAHOMA) | bringing totally unnecessary .380 handgun to track meet | 40
LYNN KATOA (COLORADO) | campus assault | 40
KEITH MCLEOD (EX-PACERS) | being the latest Pacer alum to discharge a firearm in public | 40
JAJUAN SPELLMAN (LOUISVILLE) | being so high that he forgot to take a joint out of his mouth when cops pulled him over | 40
DENNIS RODMAN (EX-BULLS, PISTONS, LAKERS) |it's just sad; no joke necessary | 38
JORGE REYES AND JOHN WALLACE (OREGON) | being dumbasses and shooting .22 rounds into a neighbor's house | 37
CHRIS HENRY (EX-BENGALS) | getting arrested way too many times | 35
GEORGIA BULLDOGS (the whole school) | generally being drunken, violent retards | 34
MARCUS VICK (EX–DOLPHINS, VATECH) | DUI, disrespecting a bicycle cop, being generally an obnoxious waste of talent | 34
GERALD SMITH (EX–PENN STATE) | being the "G" that sold coke to a narc | 32
STEFON JACKSON (UTEP) | hindering prosecution; attracting fugitives | 31
SCOTT SPIEZIO (CARDINALS) | flipping a car in the OC, staggering away from the scene, going mental at some random citizen | 31
CHANNING CROWDER (DOLPHINS) | leaving the scene, making good early impression on Bill Parcells | 30
DANIEL GRAHAM (BRONCOS) | ambiguous domestic-violence beef; hit a bedpost | 30
JASON HORTON (MISSOURI) | beating up "kitchen help" | 30
KENTON KEITH (COLTS) | refusing to leave a parking lot because he's a Colt and doesn't need to listen to anyone | 30
TYRONE NESBY (EX-CLIPPERS) | ginormous child-support debt | 30
DAN ROONEY (STEELERS) | hypocritical defense of girlfriend-punching players, but only the good ones | 30
RICHARD TODD BURGER (EX-JETS) | leg-breaking for Internet gambling site | 28
BRITTON COLQUITT (TENNESSEE) | DUI, hitting a car, hitting tree stump, then walking away from the scene | 28
ONTERRIO SMITH (EX-VIKINGS) | last stop on the Lawrence Phillips Express | 28
RYAN O'BYRNE (CANADIENS) | stealing a chick's purse | 27
TY LAWSON (UNC HOOPS) | pulling a pre-draft DUI | 25
CALVIN SCHMIDTKE | blowing a promising career before it started | 25
LOFA TATUPU (SEAHAWKS) | your basic DUI | 25
JASMINE PAYNE AND ASHLIE BILLINGSLEA (SOUTH CAROLINA) | weed, theft, more theft | 24
DONALD STRICKLAND (NINERS) | being belligerent and drunk, getting caught by cops on foot, playing for the Colts at one time | 24
DREW LAVENDER (XAVIER) | provoking cops into a body search while carrying weed | 23
CHRIS HERREN (EX-CELTICS) | shooting the horse | 22
XAVIER HICKS (WASHINGTON STATE) | putting rubbing alcohol in roommate's contact-lens case| 22
DEMARCUS GRANGER (OKLAHOMA) | stealing winter coat — in Arizona; refusing to appear | 21
CHARLES PUGH (WVU) | creative use of other peoples' credit cards | 21
JAMAR HORNSBY (FLORIDA) | buying gas with dead girl's credit card | 21
RANDY NEWSOM (AKRON AEROS) | sold shares in his future earnings in dicey scheme that Ponzi would have admired | 18
GERALD JONES AND AHMAD PAIGE (TENNESSEE) | Cheech and Chong/Up in Smoke impersonation, while in car | 12
SHAUN WHITE (X-TREME SPORTS) | spraying fire extinguisher, acting like the little douchebag he is | 11
MATT JONES (JAGUARS) | bumping rails in Fayetteville | 10
MIKHAIL MARINOVICH (SYRACUSE) | breaking into a school equipment room; adding another arrest to the family ledger | 10
BART OATES (EX-GIANTS) AND KEN DANEYKO (EX-DEVILS) | getting themselves tossed in debtor's prison | 10
JENNA PLUMLEY (OKLAHOMA) | stealing makeup from a Wal-Mart, which more than anything else is just really sad | 6
GERALD SENSABAUGH (JAGUARS) | popping wheelies | 5
AHMAD BRADSHAW (GIANTS) | ex-PlayStation thief gets violated | 3
DERRICK JONES (OREGON) | operating a less-than-one-ounce "drug house" | 1
KEVIN FAULK (PATRIOTS) | contributing to the cancer-like misery of Patriots fans | 0.5
BRYAN GRIER (MAINE) | weighing 344 pounds and power-carjacking in New Hampshire | INCOMPLETE (pending psych review)
Related:
You go, Carl, Revenge of the toad, Heightened anxiety, More
- You go, Carl
Former Minnesota Vikings defensive end Carl Eller is an early candidate for this year’s Otis Nixon Award, given to the athlete who most repeatedly shows up in the news following clashes with the criminal-justice system.
- Revenge of the toad
Some sports-crime stories aren’t funny in any way — they’re just plain violent and tragic. But every now and then you get a story that’s just pure fun.
- Heightened anxiety
Look, it’s not easy being seven feet tall.
- Tiger trap
There are a lot of famously troubled college sports programs out there, the majority of them football teams.
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You do a thing often enough, you tend to get good at that thing.
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Brett Favre walks into a bar.
- Magnum farce
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Always a darned shame when we hear that the Clemens family has fallen on hard times.
- Zero hour
Everyone knows there is a double-standard in the NFL when it comes to arrests.
- Hello, old friend
There was a recent arrest of a onetime member of the Patriots defensive backfield — old friend Lawyer Milloy.
- Return of the U
Remember the days when the University of Miami dominated college football?
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Topics:
News Features
, Baseball, Sports, Miami Dolphins, More
, Baseball, Sports, Miami Dolphins, Ahmad Paige, Andy Christensen, Ashlie Billingslea, Bill Parcells, Brandan Wright, Brandon Pettigrew, Britton Colquitt, Less