Because There Was an Election
Top 5 Unsexiest Who Proved Us Wrong
Mike Huckabee
Little Rock Star
Since he was always more of a punchline than someone whom sane people would consider voting for, we’re glad to see that the clever, seemingly sweet-natured creationist has landed on his feet with a Saturday-night Fox News TV show. For comedic purposes, we look forward to the 2012 return of Huck and Chuck.
George W. Bush
The Dubya stands for “worst”
Not the actual George W. Bush, of course, but the one played by Josh Brolin in W. If the real president was as harmlessly retarded as the character in Oliver Stone’s after-school special, then he would have never made this list in the first place.
William Kristol
Palin enabler
Why on earth would we suggest that Billy Kristol, the Skeletor-faced muse of the right, actually got sexier in late 2008? Well, he did manage to convince his Republican brethren to nominate an illiterate, moose-blowing, baby-manufacturing ignoramus for Vice President of the United States of America. Dude, that’s so hot.
Nicolas Sarkozy
French Ass Kiss
For some reason, the president of France made the Unsexiest list for sexing outrageously attractive women half his age. This was a regretful oversight of disastrous proportions, and we swear it will never happen again. (Though we can’t make any promises regarding Bret Michaels or Ted Turner.)
Christopher Hitchens
MC Hammered
It’s hard to loathe the fat, drunk, aging genius after his lasting a mere 11 seconds in a not-so-bold act of method-journalism in which he allowed himself to be waterboarded for Vanity Fair. Still, we wonder what’s next for this seeker of Middle Eastern verisimilitude: arranging for his innocent family to be gunned down by American soldiers?
Click to the last page to see who we would like to annex to the list.
