Apples and trees, continued
Man, are they putting something in the water, or what? Once again, the offspring of a high-profile sports-crime figure has fallen afoul of the law, an event that will surely soon lead to speculation that some mad Fox producer is quietly setting the stage for an outrageous new Family Feud–esque reality show involving 50 pounds of high-grade crack, a dimly lit automobile obstacle course, and America’s top-10-arrested sports families. The trend, which began about a year ago with the arrest of O.J. daughter Sydney Simpson for disorderly conduct in Miami, has in the last 12 months or so also swept up the namesake sons of sports-crime legends Dwight Gooden and Riddick Bowe on various drug-related charges. Last week, the daughter of Shakespeare-quoting felon Don King was brought in on felony drug charges following a DUI arrest in a town not far from Cleveland.
Deborah King-Lee, 44, made sure to fill out the sports-DUI-cliché chit sheet by getting busted with a suspended license in a Cadillac Escalade, the chosen vehicle of under-the-influence sports arrests. Cops searching her Caddy found a marijuana pipe in her purse and a crack pipe in a packet of cigarettes, leading to the possession bust. King family lawyer Stanley Jackson Jr., seemingly hoarse from similar announcements, told reporters that “Debbie King at this time maintains her innocence,” and “the King family supports Debbie King during these trying times.” King-Lee was arrested in Orwell, Ohio, which is about 40 miles from Cleveland, the city where her father was once arrested for stomping a man to death.
February madness
It was a tough week in college hoops, and not just for Eddie Sutton. While the prospective hall-of-famer’s DUI arrest made headlines across the country, college basketball was hit with several other ugly crime headlines, just in time for the national Bracketology craze.
In Gainesville, Florida, former player and basketball-team staff assistant Major Parker was sentenced to six months of house arrest after pleading guilty to charges of trying to sell about a pound of cocaine to an undercover policeman. Parker, the first recruit of Florida coach and Providence College legend Billy Donovan, had originally faced 40 years and fines of up to $2 million, but he recently agreed to testify against another drug dealer in exchange for the comfy house-arrest deal. With the sentence, Parker joins Eric Warfield, Jose Canseco, and former Cleveland Browns ticket manager John Tironi in one of the most eclectic clubs in sports crime — house-arrested sports figures.
Meanwhile, in Albuquerque, University of New Mexico junior forward Kyle Prochaska was charged with resisting arrest after a bizarre incident in which he passed out in a car by the side of the road, and then, when woken up, immediately began spitting on sheriff’s deputies. Prochaska joins lockup legend Isaiah Rider, boxing loony Oliver McCall, and oft-arrested University of South Florida running back Brian Fisher as athletes busted for expectorant offenses.
Last but not least, in a relatively minor incident, a pair of University of North Alabama basketball players were busted in yet another undercover crack sting. The incident was noteworthy only because the arrest brought to national attention perhaps the greatest sports name since Baskerville Holmes and Rod “He Hate Me” Smart. One of the two suspects was a UNA point guard who goes by the name Reprobatus Bibbs. If the judge doesn’t let him off for that name alone, justice has not yet arrived in Alabama.
Phat Albert strikes
One last note: the stalking arrest of dour ex–Cleveland Indian slugger Albert Belle was noteworthy for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the delicious irony of a ballplayer who used GPS to stalk his ex being affixed with tracking devices himself by the court. But it was also notable because the crime appears to be absolutely unique. Rare is the sports crime that has not been committed by another rich athlete in similar straits, but Belle was always an original, if nothing else; no other athlete, as far as we can tell, has ever used GPS to stalk female prey. Any readers who have information to the contrary are invited to write in. Until then, stay tuned to the crime wire...
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Matt Taibbi: M_Taibbi@yahoo.com
