The whole damn season was a roller coaster ride for me, and this could've been the redemption. I think that nobody wanted to eat crow. They knew, all of them — the media, the administration of the Red Sox, even Major League Baseball — what this could mean. When I walked out because I didn't get picked for the All-Star Game — which I felt I should have been picked for and possibly could have started—that'd been the low point, but now that redemption was possible I think that nobody wanted to eat the crow that they knew would come with me winning Game 7 of the World Series.

All the pitchers were down in the bullpen when Bruce was warming up. We'd had batting practice and everything, we'd gone in and got ready to play the ballgame. So where am I supposed to be drunk at? We got batting practice before the game — I think that's a regimen that's been going for 100 years — you get out there and get loose, all the stuff you do. You shag yourself some fly balls, do what you have to do to get ready for a game. So where am I supposed to be drunk at? You come into the clubhouse, you change into your uniform, and you get ready to go play a baseball game. You got 35 to 40 minutes after batting practice, and we're the last team to hit, because we're the visiting team. So where am I supposed to be getting drunk at?

They said Al Nipper told Bill Fischer I was drunk and he told McNamara. Nipper said they had to lock me in a room. I'll tell you right now, that's bullshit. It didn't happen. I talked to Al Nipper and I know that didn't happen. They're lying.

Nip said there was a meeting with McNamara, Fischer, Haywood Sullivan, and Lou Gorman and they called Nipper in and told him to check on me. He left the office and said, "I ain't fucking doing that."

I wasn't drunk; simple as that. McNamara's a liar. Now, I care for that man, but he's lying.

After the ball went through Bill Buckner's legs, I was getting ready to pitch the next day. That's all that was on my goddamn mind. So you ain't telling me I wasn't ready to pitch. My wife was in the room with me and she ain't ever known me not ready to pitch. John McNamara ain't ever known me to not be ready to pitch. For God sakes, the man said he's been managing baseball for a long time and I'm in the top five pitchers that he's ever seen. And he ain't going to put me on the mound? He made that comment. I didn't make that comment. And he ain't going to pitch me?

Charles Moss, the trainer, told me how he went to John McNamara and told him I wasn't prepared to pitch. It was on Charlie Moss to monitor me, follow me all around. It wasn't that he was with me, but I knew he was doing that shit and I knew people were reporting back to him. They had narcotics agents and all kinds of shit following me around the hotel, following me around New York City. I couldn't go shopping with my wife — they were outside my door, going down the elevator with me. Believe me, they're talking to me, they're telling me who they are. They ain't hiding nothing.

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