Dance Monkey: Jeffrey Ross

A visiting comic in the hot seat
By SARA FAITH ALTERMAN  |  August 7, 2007
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Jeffrey Ross

Jeffrey Ross | Comedy Connection, Boston | August 10–11 | 617.248.9700
What would you give as a baby-shower gift to Nicole Richie and Joel Madden?
Is there a book called “Childbirth for Dummies”?

How should Michael Vick be punished?
Michael Vick should be eaten by starving pit bulls — or Rosie O’Donnell. His choice.

What’s the longest you’ve gone without showering?
When I lived in the Warren Towers dorm on the Boston University campus, I once went a whole semester without showering because I was so embarrassed by my tiny shmeckel. Thanks to proper vitamins and six surgical procedures, I’m now normal-sized.

Aren’t kitty videos on YouTube just adorable?
The Internet is really just for porn and the Drudge Report. Occasionally I Google “Google” until my computer shuts down.

Tammy Faye Messner, right before she died, went on tv and said that she believed she was going straight to heaven. What do you think her heaven looks like?
She’s not dead. I could swear I saw her working in the make-up department of Filene’s Basement.

If you could have a superpower, what would it be?
I already have a superpower. I’m fuckin’ hilarious! Come see my superhuman comedic skills this weekend! It’s a bird . . . it’s a plane . . . it’s a Jew comic!

Related: When sportscasters attack, NFL follies, Skell of the year, More more >
  Topics: Comedy , Boston University, Joel Madden, Nicole Richie,  More more >
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