For a few dollars less

By SARA FAITH ALTERMAN  |  September 4, 2007

As for who shells out the bucks, whether you’re a chick or a dick, you should pony up and go Dutch. It’s the cheapest option, and that way nobody feels obliged to put out. (Or is that just me? I am kind of slutty.)

Here’s the point, kids: the notion that dates have to be extravagant, strategic touchstones of courtship is a bunch of bullshit. Poor people need to get laid, too, and if your date has even an ounce of self-respect, a wink and a Heineken aren’t going to seduce them into stripping down to their fun-derwear.

You have to put some effort in, even if you are completely broke. It’s the thought that counts, not the price of dinner or drinks. Honestly, creativity earns way more brownie points than an overpriced martini at whatever homogenous nightlife spot is the trend of the minute. You should be stressing over classes and your uncomfortable extra-long dormitory twin bed, not over the lack of cash in your pocket. After all, money can buy a lot of things, but it can’t always buy you a good time. Well, unless you’ve got an extra $20.

Sara Faith Alterman, who totally can’t be done for $15, can be reached at salterman@phx.com.

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