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The Hills Have Eyes

Horror remake piles on the gore

By BRET MICHEL | August 10, 2009

1.0 Stars

NO NUKES: Stopping nuclear proliferation can prevent movies like these.

When gun-toting conservative Bob Carter (Ted Levine) and his God-fearing wife (Kathleen Quinlan) and family break down on a vacation drive across New Mexico, all hell is unleashed — and as surviving son-in-law (and liberal weenie) Doug (Aaron Stanford) discovers, “The lucky ones die first.” Atomic mutations stand in for the cave-dwelling cannibal hillbillies of Wes Craven’s 1977 geek-show in Alexandre Aja’s wretched remake, and if further argument were needed for ending nuclear proliferation, it would be to eliminate the premise of movies like this. Better yet, the ratings board could have done its job, slapping on an NC-17 — the cinematic kiss of death. Aja showed his sense of ’70s æsthetics in last year’s Haute tension; here, he never moves beyond homage, adding only unblinking amounts of gore. Horror fans may love it. I, for one, blinked.

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When gun-toting conservative Bob Carter (Ted Levine) and his God-fearing wife (Kathleen Quinlan) and family break down on a vacation drive across New Mexico, all hell is unleashed.