Parental desperation sets in; maybe he's still wee enough to be the Youngest Inventor®, but how long can they chase the dragon? How long till Guinness stops taking their calls and Maury finds younger talent? How many years until dad's feverishly registering a trademark for World's Teenagest Boat Owner® while Julian stares glassy-eyed at his Lifetime Achievement plaque, now a mocking tombstone for his obscenely front-loaded fame, and sees the reflection of a careworn pubescent face he no longer recognizes?
So chill the fuck out already, Julian Pavone's parents.
DAVID THORPE | firstname.lastname@example.org
: Big Hurt
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