Although I’m loath to dis a little kid, I’m not sure I’m buying the prodigy business. He’s definitely a child with the physical ability to hit drums with drumsticks, but if you ignore the fact that he’s three, he’s just a shitty drummer. Maybe his early start will make him perform at the level of a 15-year-old drummer when he’s 12, but in the meantime, let’s not worry too much about the little drummer boy’s denying some hardworking virtuoso a spot at Berklee. My editor, being an actual journalist, took the time to contact Berklee:

“The press release about Julian Pavone attending a Berklee program at the age of three appears to be the result of some miscommunication,” says Rob Hayes, Berklee’s assistant vice-president for public information. “We simply aren’t in the business of educating children that young. I expect our Summer Performance Program for high-school students will still be going strong 10 years from now, and perhaps Julian will join us at that point.”

‘Trixter To Reunite’
Source: A bunch of guys running out of money, I suppose.
I might as well just put one big [sic] in front of this whole dealie and assure you that I’m presenting it verbatim: “The rock bamd TRIXTER is now reunited again after 13 years!!! They will be having a new CD out shortly! for more info.”

That’s right: the beloved C-list hair-metal “bamd” are ready to rock again! Better still, they will have been . . . having . . . had a new album! The exquisite press release goes on to recount the band’s career in excruciating, frequently capitalized detail:

“The video for ‘ONE IN A MILLION’ went #1 on MTV for 3 weeks. The album peaked at #28 on BILLBOARD’s TOP 200 ALBUM CHART and the single for ‘GIVE IT TO ME GOOD’ was a TOP 50 HIT on BILLBOARD’s TOP 100 SINGLES CHART.”

But of course, all good things must come to an end:

“Unfortunately , Grunge had taken over the airwaves which left little room for the single, ‘ROAD OF A THOUSAND DREAMS’ on Radio & MTV. . . . Lot’s of Fun, but the writing was on the wall that TRIXTER’s style of Pop Metal had run its course. Time to move on . . . but what a great ride.”

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