By the way, I spelled Jamiroquai right on the first try without reference, proving beyond doubt that I'm the world's greatest writer.

In an interview with Melbourne's Herald Sun, CHRIS MARTIN said that he regrets giving the song "Scars" to NATALIE IMBRUGLIA, since it could have been the greatest Coldplay track ever. Yow! Imbruglia interprets Coldplay? It's like a shot of methedrine straight into the eyeball. In a related story, BONO called Chris Martin a "wanker" in a recent radio interview. How much of a wanker do you have to be to make Bono notice? Bono calling you a wanker is like Hitler calling you a dick.

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