With the big, bad bishops coming down hard on organizations like the Girl Scouts, you can bet the moms and dads who adore little Sissy — and appreciate the wisdom and self-reliance she is picking up at the Girl Scout activities — just might find a reason to move to another house of worship come Sunday.

A recent survey showed the percentages of Catholics in the US and even Little Rhody are dropping. But the numbers must have been cooked by some promiscuous lesbians, right, Benny?


SAVE THE OCEAN MIST

Hope you caught the story in Sunday's New York Times about the eroding shoreline in Matunuck. Figuring prominently in the tale was the fate of the Ocean Mist nightclub, a wonderful spot for beer and music that is situated right on the coast and is in mortal danger. Phoenix ad master Bruce Allen was heard crying, "Save the Ocean Mist!" We're with you on that, Bruce.


MARRIAGE EQUALITY UPDATE

As we hit deadline last week, President Obama's evolution on the question of same-sex marriage was just completing. Soon after that, our evolved Governor, the Lincmeister, stepped up and issued an executive order declaring that the Biggest Little will recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states. Despite all of this good news, there is still the matter of the federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). Federal action is what is required to fully address this issue once and for all. Now that you've signed on to the cause, Senator Reed, get to work.


FIGHT CLUBS

While the brawls breaking out in and around Providence nightclubs are becoming an enormous blight on Our Little Towne, Public Safety Commissioner Steven Paré insists that the law allowing the 18-to-21-year-old crowd inside is not the core problem.

While P&J believe that youthful entry is an accident waiting to happen, Paré told the City Council that the legal, over-21 drinkers have been involved in the most fights.

Ultimately, the responsibility for quelling bust-out violent behavior rests with individual clubs. They can't allow weapons, they have to police themselves inside and outside, and they have to cut off those who appear to be a threat.

Anyone who has worked in a bar (and P&J both have a good deal of experience in that field) can tell exactly who the troublemakers are going to be as the night progresses. Continuing to put up with obviously over-the-line, provocative behavior is just inviting a problem. A good, sane crew of bartenders and bouncers can put a stop to the madness.

Places that have enjoyed success with the under-21 set, like Lupo's, can show the way on this. And the police on the night beat, we are sure, would be happy to point the licensing board to the problem clubs if they had any reason to believe the castratos on that panel might actually come down hard on the worst offenders.


A LITTLE JEWEL IN PROVIDENCE

If you haven't had the opportunity to stop by the Sidebar Bistro on Dorrance Street in the capital city, we urge you to check this place out. The food is terrific, the crowd eclectic, and it has a musical menu that is heavy on jazz, a hard-to-find commodity around here, especially since the passing of Larry Friedlander and the closing of his beloved Hi Hat.

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