Same Old, Same Old

By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  September 19, 2012

Dan has also written a book called Jocks: True Stories of America's Gay Male Athletes, about the struggles of being homosexual in the macho sporting world. He knows only too well. In one of the more amazing episodes of his personal life, Dan used the occasion of his keynote address in front of 2000 national delegates at the annual conference of the US Youth Soccer Association, of which he was then president, to publicly announce that he is gay.

Talk about balls.


MITT'S MATH

Mannequin Mitt Romney thinks President Obama has 47 percent of the electorate locked up. Perhaps he's finally taken off his shoes and counted how many votes the billionaire friends who are financing his campaign can actually cast.


WEEK IN REVIEW

This week Politico gave us a photo of what, at first, appeared to be a man taking a leak about 50 yards behind President Obama at a rally in Cincinnati. Later, the Secret Service claimed the man was an agent, checking for threats approaching from the rear. If so, we must tell the agent that one's "quick draw" capabilities are limited when one hand is busy shaking off Mr. John Thomas Johnson.

Meanwhile in Europe, photographs of the Duchess of Cambridge's hogans surfaced in a French publication. That had press magnate and former Italian prime minister Silvio "Bunga Bunga" Berlusconi asking, "Hey, how come we can't have cool stuff like this in Italy?" And he went ahead and published some of the photos in a couple of his rags. (Silvio never disappoints when it comes to behaving like a vapid and frivolous wastrel.)

And then there was something about angry mobs attacking US Embassies all over the world, but your superior correspondents had no time for that sort of tedious boilerplate when we learned that someone reported seeing Mick Jagger at the Chelo's in Warwick over the weekend!

Of course, this report was totally unsubstantiated, which makes it ideal subject matter for the Cool, Cool World. The story goes that Mick was sailing off of Martha's Vineyard when he got a hankering for some real American food instead of that fancy continental slop he's constantly being fed. No confirmation that Sir Mick asked for a senior discount (but a tip of the sombrero to Rockin' Joe Hebert for floating the question).

Since he was coming in by sea, Chelo's trumped Stanley's; Warwick is on the water, you see, and Central Falls is not a shore community, no matter how hard it tries. But all is not lost for Stanley's.

We hear that Keith Richards's wife Patti has relatives in Pawtucket and that he has been seen on land here. Perhaps Stanley's could create a special "Keef-burger" (with a ketchup design in the shape of syringe) and lure the reclusive rock star.


HOLLYWOOD IMAGERY FROM VSA

The Rhode Island Department of Education recently cut funding for VSA arts Rhode Island, a non-profit arts and education organization for people with disabilities.

Nonetheless, VSA has a show coming up at Roots Arts and Cultural Center on Westminster Street in downtown Providence. It features work created by students and teachers at Toll Gate High School — photographic images inspired by the 1943 film For Whom the Bell Tolls. The project was directed by Keith Jochim who, along with being a fine actor, is an accomplished photographer.

The show kicks off with an artists' reception September 20 from 6 to 9 pm and it will be up at Roots through October 14. But due to the funding cuts, this could be the last show of its kind for some time. Make an effort to get to see what these marvelous special artists are creating.

Send a rake and Pulitzer-grade tips to p&j@phx.com.

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