Flawed gene pool

Valicenti blows his own horn; more toll woes; Hollyweird East
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  August 28, 2013

There is no more ruthless self-promoter in Vo Dilun than Phillipe and Jorge’s friend and occasional adversary Buddy “Vincent A.” Cianci, who makes his living these days as a talk show host/opinion-shaper/wild man on WPRO and Channel 6. But a challenger appears to be stepping up.

We’re referring to Gene Valicenti, the gent living two lives as the host of The WPRO Morning News and anchorman for the NBC10 ’JARheads’ 5:30 and 6 pm news shows (though we tread lightly when using “news” to describe the local relevance of car crashes in North Dakota).

Since taking on the dual roles, Geno has shamelessly promoted himself along the lines of “Come watch me tonight at 5:30 on Channel 10” during his morning gig and “Listen to me in the morning on WPRO” in his ’JARhead slot.

Gene, we don’t care much about how you present your personal brand. As long as the facts are right, a zombie could supply us with the news we want to know. The best representative of that style of preposterous preening is NBC’s Brian Williams, who we’re supposed to respect because he looks like Mommy just scrubbed him up and parted his hair for Sunday church services, and who apparently has much more knowledge than we do because he’s reading off a teleprompter script produced by a staff of writers and reporters.

P&J hark back to our serious affection for the younger Valicenti, the pit bull reporter for the ’JARheads who sported a porn star mustache and trench coat and had no qualms about banging on the front doors of suspected criminals, demanding to speak to the occupants and scaring the living shit out of anyone in the neighborhood. There was no one better or more entertaining, unless you include WLNE/Channel 6’s former flame-haired starlet reporter Magee Hickey posing as a prostitute to enliven a story. Ah, the good old days.

Yes, we love ya, Gene, and you’re a pro. But let’s lighten up a bit. Especially when you have to kiss the ass of your follow-on, John DePetro.

Roll the dice

Now that Twin River in Lincoln has introduced table games such as blackjack and roulette, word comes to P&J from a reliable source at the betting parlor that, while the gambling Mecca’s management touts its job creation, there are big problems behind the scenes.

This would be the apparent shortage of people with the ability to pass the casino’s background checks. P&J’s source tells us that more than 100 certified employees are desperately needed to handle demand.

Business as usual in the Biggest Little . . . .

Toll-tal disaster

One would think that, considering the recent debacle surrounding the Sakonnet River Bridge’s 10-cent toll, the hapless Rhode Island Turnpike and Bridge Authority would try its best to show a semblance of competence.

Whoops! Not so.

Phillipe and Jorge were recently exposed to a mammoth screw-up at the Newport Bridge toll plaza that makes RITBA execs look like they couldn’t operate a Slinky without instructions.

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