Bring on the alt-holidays

By PHOENIX STAFF  |  December 31, 2013

July

July 7-14: Creative Maladjustment Week | Also every week before and after this one.

July 12: Simplicity Day | Just be.

July 18: National Caviar Day | Well aren’t we fancy! For those with the taste (and means) to celebrate this holiday, visit European Food Market (102 Rolfe Sq, Cranston), which can satisfy all of your salt-cured fish-egg cravings.

August

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August 8: Dalek Day | If there is life out there in the universe, it’s likely to be mutant extraterrestrial monster villains bent on destroying our way of life. (To be fair, it’ll probably think the same about us.) This day honors the birthday of Terry Nation, the Doctor Who writer who helped us envision those enemies. Does anyone haunt your existence with relentlessly repetitive recitations of mindless orders? We suggest greeting them with a single word: “Exterminate!”

August 11-15: National Scrabble Week | This year’s celebration might have a somber tone, given that the National Scrabble Association disbanded in 2013 due to a lack of both financial and philosophical support from game owner and toy giant Hasbro. The shut-down “reflects a broader conflict between corporate and intellectual forces in American cultural life,” author and Scrabble enthusiast Stefan Fatsis wrote in the New York Times in July — these days, corporations are much more interested in promoting the Scrabble brand on Facebook than in substantively nurturing the game that “fosters mind-blowing creativity, heart-stopping tension and computer-stretching quantitative analysis.”

August 24: Go Topless Day | Just do it.

September

Be Kind to Editors and Writers Month | ’Nuff said. We accept money, hugs, and alcohol as forms of kindness. Also, articles submitted without spelling and grammatical errors, PR flacks not calling to follow up on press releases, and story pitches only after prospective freelancers know which publication they’re contacting.

Save the Koala Month | Koalas don’t need to drink water because they get sufficient moisture from gumleaves, the main component of their diet. They are not currently listed as an endangered species, but their habitat (eucalyptus forests in Australia) is fast-disappearing. The More You Know.

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September 24: National Punctuation Day | The classic example of why punctuation matters is: “Let’s eat grandma” as contrasted with “Let’s eat, grandma.” Spend the day striving for better clarity through more accurate communication. Bolster your skills by reading Shady Characters: The Secret Life of Punctuation, Symbols, and Other Typographical Marks by Keith Houston.

October

Squirrel Awareness and Appreciation Month | Celebrate by hitting YouTube and digging into clips featuring Rocky the Flying Squirrel and Sandy Cheeks from SpongeBob SquarePants, or dust off the Nintendo 64 and take Conker for a ride in Diddy King Racing or Conker’s Bad Fur Day.

October 14: Ada Lovelace Day | Attention, girl geeks! Honoring the British mathematician known as the world’s first computer programmer, Ada Lovelace Day is marked worldwide by Wikipedia Edit-A-Thons, organized to shift the reality that women are underrepresented, both as entry subjects and as participants, on Wikipedia. Learn more at FindingAda.com.

October 23: National Mole Day | Commemorating Avogadro’s Number (6.02 x 10 23 ), which is the basis for a fundamental measuring unit in chemistry. It runs from 6:02 am to 6:02 pm. Here’s how big a mole is: If you were going to count from 1 to 6.02 x 10 23 starting at 6:02 am, you’d need to count to 14 each quintillionth of a second to make it all the way before the end of the 12-hour span of Mole Day.

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