In Maine, a 2013 legislative study determined that imposing a limited property tax on exempt entities such as private schools, hospitals, and foundations would have generated about $100 million for municipalities. But that research didn’t include religious institutions. If it had, that figure would have been (my best godly guess) $30 million higher, enough to cover most of the municipal revenue-sharing deficit in the current state budget.
Look, Angus, I heap blessings upon you for having the courage to go after a sacred cow like the NFL. But even if you were successful in taxing pro football, all you’d be doing is forcing some poor sap at Gillette Stadium to shell out even more than the nearly 40 bucks it costs for two beers and two hot dogs. I’d have my son turn water into wine and multiply some loaves and fishes for folks like that, but NFL rules prohibit outside vendors.
Churches, on the other hand, would do what I’ve told them, which is to turn the other cheek. They’d render unto Caesar by selling the bishop’s mansion or requiring the parson to downgrade from a tricked out GMC Sierra (official vehicle of the NFL) to a used Nissan Versa (official vehicle of the Reverend Buncombe’s Bible study class).
I have spoken.
It’s almost as if something took possession of my soul and wrote this week’s column for me. You can send whatever it was an email firstname.lastname@example.org.