Knitters get the point
There is an old drag queen joke — most likely apocryphal — about graffiti in a gay bar’s men’s room wall that says, “My mother made me a homosexual.” An added line asks, “If I give her the yarn, will she make me one, too?”
Cheap jokes notwithstanding, the delightful Gina Macris, a longtime friend at the Other Paper, has been churning out knitting books in her spare time. If you have some time and energy on your hands, and want to use knitting needles for something other than putting out your eyes or tucking your hair into a bun, check these out.
Gina’s oeuvre to date includes The Well-Knit Home: Simple Techniques for Beautiful Results and The Elegant Knitter: Simple Techniques for Beautiful Results, written with Lynn P. Bryan, which may be an penname for former Providence Bishop Louis Gelineau. (Sorry, Gina, we just can’t pass up a chance for a gratuitous gag line.)
At any rate, give the books a look. Gina has been a fine and intrepid reporter for the BeloJo for years, and we can imagine this translating into some serious weaving advice.
Sorry to ask favors, but Phillipe’s beloved cat, Gris-Gris, has gone missing since Christmas from his Newport home, at the corner of Rhode Island Avenue and Memorial Boulevard. Any and all information from the vicinity is welcome, as the police and the Potter Animal Shelter have already been contacted, but no joy as yet.
Gris-Gris is a small, thin cat, all gray on gray, as the name suggests, about 12 pounds on a good day. He is very friendly, which makes P&J think he may have been taken in as a suspected stray. P. has walked the streets of the neighborhood looking for him, with no luck. If you have even the slightest bit of info, please call the Phoenix at 401.273.6397. Thanks in advance to anyone who can help out.
Galactico to galaxy
While your superior correspondents don’t normally dabble in sports — despite our longstanding love of them — we feel obliged to offer input when a sports star celebrated as a metrosexual makes the headlines.
We refer, of course, to soccer megastar David “Bend it Like” Beckham, who will be leaving the esteemed Spanish club, Real Madrid, for the low-life Los Angeles Galaxy of the USA’s hideous Major League Soccer. This is like moving from a mansion to a fifth-floor walk-up in a ghetto.
In Spain, the Real Madrid players are referred to as galacticos, or superstars. The Galaxy players can’t hold a candle to players at that level, but it is doubtless a good move for the 31-year-old Beckham, who is past his prime. Of course, that won’t keep him from making almost a million a week for five years, through his playing contract and from endorsement deals. Wife Victoria, formerly known as “Posh Spice,” of the unlistenable Spice Girls, will aid and abet.
The media overkill about Beckham’s signing has compared this to the now-defunct New York Cosmos’ North American Soccer League’s signing of Pele — who was arguably the most famous soccer player of all time, and deservedly so.