Over and out for Opie

Newsman takes a walk rather than embrace tabloid lexicon
By PHILIPPE + JORGE  |  August 6, 2008

It was quite the news flash last week when Phillipe + Jorge’s old buddy Jim “Opie” Hummel quit Channel 6 in a burst of flames, and to our critical minds, glory.

Opie faulted the management at Global Broadcasting of Southern New England for trying to add extra zing to newscasts by using such words as “lowlife” and “thug,” which Hummel found a bit much.

Although P+J believe it is tough to cover Our Little Towne without using these words, and nearly impossible to do so when reporting on Biggest Little
politics, we take his point. We still have faith that this will not deter Channel 6’s current management from proceeding on its current path until we have newscasts that sound like scenes from Deadwood. Eyes on the effin’ prize, guys.

Opie said he also found some discomfort in working alongside ABC6’s part-time political analyst, living legend Buddy “Vincent A.” Cianci, because of Hummel’s many years of reporting on Cianci.

P+J know that Opie will doubtless land on his feet, since, along with JARhead Jim Taricani and Sean “What police line?” Daly at Channel 12, he has been among the handful of local wild and crazy reporters who consistently come up with solid, aggressively pursued, and flashy stories that contain some actual scoops, whistle-blowing, and investigative reportage. That’s a rare commodity these days.

We know Hummel will be OK. Opie, you can always come over to Casa Diablo and float in the pool on our Styrofoamed chaise lounge, with a grapefruit and Pernod in hand, waiting for the calls to come in.

Big whoop-dee-doo
Whee! Yippee! Gas has gone below $4 a gallon. Let’s celebrate!

Your superior correspondents can’t believe the media are actually making a big deal about us supposedly having been rescued from being gouged so hard by Big Oil. Meanwhile, yahoos whose knowledge about the environment can fit into a thimble continue to bray about drilling offshore or in the Arctic National Wildlife Reserve. It will obscenely fuck up the Arctic and our marine habitats forever, but what a small price to pay to fill up your SUV, right? (Which is why we are appalled that Senator Obama now suggests that it be seriously considered, under the guise of promoting an overall revised energy policy. Bullshit, Barack.)

No, boys and girls, the damage has been done. Our Congress is now and forever will be sold out to Big Oil and the auto industry, and no drama queen political posturing will change things. Dubya, “Big Time” and the good buddies of every person under the Capitol dome get richer, and you can just bend over and grab your ankles like good peons. 

The real crime is that the pols and media never had the guts to point out the outright lies and gluttony of Big Oil and Detroit, or their own complicity.

Cue Leonard Cohen:
Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
Everybody knows that the war is over
Everybody knows the good guys lost
Everybody knows the fight was fixed
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
That’s how it goes
Everybody knows

When Irish eyes are smiling
P+J offer a tip of the hat to longtime political inside man Joe Brady, currently a honcho on House Speaker Bill Murphy’s staff, who was recently reelected to s second two-year term on the Ancient Order of Hibernians’ national board.

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