If I could be there at Livestock/So many herds to see/Teenagers with beards and heroes/Two-fingered people feeling free. Instead of eating potato chips/They should have been making plans/For hard work and rest and fresh fruit/Ten fingers using both hands
"Livestock" by Tim Duffy
Less than a year after Woodstock occurred, my friend Tim Duffy penned this ditty (with accompanying music). It sort of summed up the attitude of a distinct minority of (mostly twentysomething) peers at the time: that Woodstock quickly turned into a mammoth, overhyped marketing fraud. In essence it had more to do with hordes of hormone-frenzied "ute" trying to get high and get laid than it had to do with peace and love.
Your superior correspondents are not as harsh on our entire generation as, say, our friend Tom Connell who, in a letter to the BeloJo, saw nothing but "Me Generation" sense of entitlement at Woodstock. Phillipe, who was actually there, says the way it is now being remembered has nothing to do with the reality of the event, especially if you were there, because you had no perspective — and were more concerned with getting high and wishing you were getting laid. Yeah, a lot of people, but who has some hash? And the acts that made the biggest impression were my established faves like Hendrix and the Who, working at the top of their games, and newbies Joe Cocker, who blew the joint out and, of all things, Mountain, because Leslie West and Corky Laing sizzled. From that day on it was just p.r.
Our Woodstock perspective is more along the lines of what veteran rock critic Ed Ward had to say in last week's Phoenix. That Woodstock was some sort of magical moment that had actual meaning is a notion that the denizens of Casa Diablo consider bullshit. We who actually believe in stuff like "peace" and "love" and "justice" know that it takes really hard work and commitment — 10 fingers using both hands.
TWO RIGHT FEET
P+J were en pointe in our ballerina slippers at Casa Diablo when we heard that former GOP U.S. House Majority Leader Tom "The Hammer" DeLay would be joining the contestants on the new season of Dancing With The Stars. (Just to clarify for the culturally deprived, the Neanderthal DeLay will be considered one of the Z-list "stars" featured on the show.)
We heard that in order to make him more comfortable, the producers of the show agreed to provide Tommy with a partner who would meet the former exterminator's preference for maximum sexual and social compatibility. This, he has been paired with a giant male cockroach named Marcel.
NOT SO JOCKULAR
Once again, local school committees have been able to piss off P&J no end by using school sports as a cheap and phony crowbar to try to leverage more money from the taxpayers.