Road to riches

By AL DIAMON  |  November 18, 2009

The toll plaza wouldn't cost quite as much as all the gambling taxes Hollywood Slots in Bangor has paid since it opened ($57 million). Its budget wouldn't cover the estimated cost of buying the MERC incinerator in Biddeford ($62 million). And it doesn't come close to what the state treasury is losing due to the Baldacci administration's decision to lease its wholesale liquor business to a private company for 10 years ($26 million annually).

But $56 million is still enough to pay for some nice Christmas gifts. For instance, you could mail out 1.3 million copies — one for every person in the state — of the new CD by 80-year-old Aroostook County resident Joyce Rossi-Gammon called A Tater Farm In Maine (about $17 million). You could put Stephen King's latest bestseller, Under The Dome, under every tree ($12 million, assuming Amazon ships for free). And add holiday cheer by stuffing the stockings of those of legal drinking age with four-packs of Geary's Imperial IPA ($9 million, including bottle deposit).

All that still totals less than the price of a toll plaza, so let's use the difference to treat every homeless person in Maine to a first-class meal at 555 restaurant in Portland (the kind of repast turnpike authority directors have been known to enjoy). For starters, order Bangs Island mussels ($12.95), followed by orchard apple salad ($9.95), with a main course of pan-roasted pheasant breast ($31.95), and phyllo-pear tart for dessert ($9). Add in a couple glasses of good champagne ($15 each), and the bill for 850 people, with tax and generous tip, comes to just over $85,000. And you'd still have enough left to build a decent toll plaza.

Enjoy your gifts. Thank-you notes can be sent to aldiamon@herniahill.net.

< prev  1  |  2  | 
  Topics: Talking Politics , Public Transportation, Transportation, U.S. Senate,  More more >
| More


Most Popular
ARTICLES BY AL DIAMON
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   THE E.C. PLAN  |  September 12, 2014
    Independent gubernatorial candidate Eliot Cutler has proposed a much-needed change in the way Maine chooses its governor. Under the Cutler plan, the only people allowed to run would be those with the initials E.C.  
  •   PIMPING AND PANDERING  |  September 03, 2014
    And so, the excitement of the fall political campaigns begins.  
  •   BEAR WITH ME  |  August 31, 2014
    It’s the fall of 2015. A bear walks into a doughnut shop in Portland and says, “Give me two dozen assorted to go.”  
  •   LOOK OUT, CLEVELAND  |  August 21, 2014
    Eric Brakey is an energetic guy. But as an admirer of sloth, I have intense disdain for the excessively active.  
  •   LET 'EM FIGHT  |  August 14, 2014
    Politics and Other Mistakes

 See all articles by: AL DIAMON