Flick the bean
We refer here to the clitoris, the only human organ designed for one purpose and one purpose only: Pleasure! Taking the girl seriously means knowing and loving that 70 percent of women achieve an orgasm with direct clitoral stimulation, and that it does tend to take longer than the perfunctory three minutes you see in porn. And ladies, don't be shy about getting your own hands in the mix. It's pretty hot when a woman takes charge over her own pleasure.
Nurture your erotic imagination
When trying to get your libido flickering again, thinking about what turns you on and exploring sexual fantasy is a step in the right direction. And if your own fantasy life has gotten stale, how about erotica? Or maybe porn? You may find yourself inspired by new positions, settings, or activities.
Touch and text
Try this simple exercise that helps couples get reconnected (best for when you know you'll have some private time at the end of the day): Wake up a little early and spend time caressing each other everywhere except your naughty bits. Throughout the day, indulge each other with e-mails, texts, or maybe a phone call. Messages can be anything from appreciating the smell of your partner's hair to more frisky ideas of what you might do later.
Medications, lack of sleep, stress, smoking, age, and hormonal changes can all have an impact on one's interest in gettin' it on. Make the commitment to take care of your hot self with sufficient rest, exercise, and healthy food. And don't forget to do your pelvic floor exercises (i.e., Kegels). The health benefits abound, and in terms of pleasure, your pc (pubococcygeus) muscles are what contract during an orgasm, so it follows that the stronger your muscles are, the stronger your orgasms will be!
Deirdre Fulton can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Orgasm, Inc. | March 25 @ 7:30 pm | at SPACE Gallery, 538 Congress St, Portland | $7 | space538.org