Here's how the indictment handed down this week concludes: "In truth and in fact, as Clemens well knew when he gave this testimony, Clemens knowingly received injections of anabolic steroids while he was an MLB player."
Clemens is going to go down as one of the all-time bad guys in sports. He was a hired mercenary who sold out multiple teams, pitched for cash instead of glory, faded in big games for much of his career, cheated, lied about cheating, and was a boorish twit to boot. The trial of Clemens is going to be a gorgeous exercise in chickens coming home to roost.
Matt Taibbi can be reached at m_taibbi@yahoo.com.
LEADER BOARD
BRUNO SOUZA (FLAMENGO, BRAZIL) | murder for hire, feeding girlfriend's remains to Rottweilers | 100
QUENTIN WYCHE (EX-FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL) | murder, taunting | 100
JEREMY GREEN (EX-BROWNS) | kiddie porn, coke | 90
BOGDAN RUDENKO (EX–COLORADO SPRINGS GOLD KINGS) | murder | 90
BRENT VINSON (EX-TENNESSEE) | accessory to murder | 89
MIGUEL STARKS AND REGINALD RICE (EX–THE CITADEL) | Clockwork Orange–style home invasion | 88
PHILLIP MERLING (DOLPHINS) | wantonly whacking pregnant girlfriend | 88
LANCE STEPHENSON (PACERS) | bashing baby mama's head on stairs | 86
ROBERT MITCHELL AND KELLY WHITNEY (EX–SETON HALL) | eight — count 'em, eight — counts of kidnapping | 85
JAMAL GREENE (EX-KANSAS) | Clockwork Orange armed home invasion | 80
JAMIE HARRIS AND KEVIN PHILLIP (DREXEL) | armed home invasion robbery netting two cell phones | 80
LAWRENCE TAYLOR (EX-GIANTS) | sullying a legend; statutory rape | 71
TYLER CAMPBELL (COASTAL CAROLINA) | kidnapping and pet assault | 70
GUERDWICH MONTIMERE (ODESSA-PERMIAN) | being someone else | 70
ROGER CLEMENS (YANKEES) | lying his fat ass off to Congress | 67.8
WARREN SAPP (EX-BUCS) | girlfriend-choking | 63
FRANCISCO RODRIGUEZ (METS) | beating up common-law father in-law | 62
CLINTON HART (EX-RAMS) | Facebook fracas | 61
ANTWON CHISHOLM , MIKE FLEURIZARD, AND FRED PICKETT (MARSHALL) | robbing, kicking pizza-delivery boys | 60
BEN ROETHLISBERGER (STEELERS) | another sexual assault allegation | 60
GARY BROWN (FLORIDA) | girl-hitting/scratching | 58
SANTONIO HOLMES (STEELERS) | chucking a glass at chick's face in nightclub | 58
LAMICHAEL JAMES (OREGON) | girlfriend-choking | 58
MONTEZ ROBINSON (GEORGIA) | family violence | 58
DEON ANDERSON (COWBOYS) | scary gun-waving incident | 50
ZACK KASSIAN (SABRES DRAFTEE) | punching some sap in the face | 48
GERALD AND BRANDON LAIRD, AND THEIR CRAZY-ASS GRANDPA (TIGERS, YANKEES) | messing with Eddie House's wife, attacking security guards | 48
CEDRIC BENSON (BENGALS) | punching a dude in a bar in Austin | 41
GILBERT ARENAS (WIZARDS) | fun with guns | 40
CHRIS TERRY (EX-CHIEFS, BENGALS) | a standard "Bulldog" | 35
DUSTY DVORACEK (BEARS) | being a big hulking drunken menace to bouncers | 31
TERRANCE TOLIVER (LSU) | resisting arrest, getting himself Tasered | 31
DEQUAN STARLING AND T.J. DRAKEFORD (MARSHALL) | shoving cops while smashed | 28
DAMON EVANS (UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA) | driving drunk with mistress's red panties in lap | 26
KIKO ALONSO (OREGON) | DUI; another arrested Duck | 25
RONNIE BROWN (DOLPHINS) | DUI | 25
CHRIS CHELIOS (CHICAGO WOLVES) | DUI | 25
FRANKIE HAMMOND (FLORIDA) | DUI | 25
REY MAUALUGA (BENGALS) | driving drunk en route to teenie ménage a trois | 25
VONDRELL MCGEE (TEXAS) | DUI | 25
GARY TINSLEY (MINNESOTA) | fleeing cops on a moped | 23
VINCE YOUNG (TITANS) | overreacting to remarks made about his alma mater | 23
ZACH BROWNELL (SOUTH ALABAMA) | drunkenly smashing parked cars | 22
JEREMIAH MASOLI AND GARRETT EMBRY (OREGON) | boosting laptops | 20
GUY MORRISS (TEXAS A&M COMMERCE) | suppressing First Amendment | 19
SHAUN ROGERS (BROWNS) | putting loaded .45 on airport metal detector | 19
J.J. HONES (STANFORD) | golf-cart DUI | 18
RYAN LEAF (EX-CHARGERS) | being the worst quarterback of all time, stealing hydrocodone | 17
SHAWNE WILLIAMS AND KAREEM COOPER (ex-MEMPHIS) | gun-and-weed traffic stop | 15
CHARLES SHACKLEFORD (EX-NETS) | having huge feet; pretending to be Jayson Williams; pills | 14
JEREMIAH MASOLI (OREGON) | backing out of a driveway without a license, with pot in the glove box | 10
TERRY GLENN (EX-PATRIOTS) | blew off rental-car bill | 9
CHARLES ROGERS (EX-LIONS) | violated court order by passing out drunk in a plate of Mexican food | 8
KEITH MCCANTS (EX-BUCCANEERS) | being a pipehead over and over again | 6
MIKE RAGONE (NOTRE DAME) | blazing up in a car | 6
ZACH RANDOLPH (GRIZZLIES) | financing weed dealing in Indy? | 2 (PENDING)
TRENT DITTMER, ZACH METTENBERGER, JOSH PARRISH (GEORGIA) | underage boozing | 1
BLAINE GAUTIER, RODNEY GILLIS, DEVON LEWIS-BUCHANAN, CHRIS RICHARD (LOUISIANA-LAFAYETTE) | weed, weed, weed, and weed | 1
PHIL SIMMS (TITANS) | weed | 1
UDONIS HASLEM (HEAT) | weed | 0.5
COREY STOKES (VILLANOVA) | peeing between cars | 0.43
JAMARCUS RUSSELL (EX-RAIDERS) | minding his own business with codeine syrup | 0
JORDAN LOVE (GEORGIA) | refusing to give middle name to pushy cops | -14
