THEIR RELUCTANT MANAGER: At least Rosario Dawson brings some desperately needed acting ability. |
“Sometimes I get the feeling that life left us behind a long time ago.”Kevin Smith might have done well to have stopped and pondered this notion as he wrote it alongside more of his famously bawdy dialogues for dead-end layabouts Dante Hicks (Brian O’Halloran) and Randall Graves (Jeff Anderson). Returning to the pop-culture-obsessed vulgarians from New Jersey seems to have energized Smith, who’s never quite followed through on the promise he showed 12 years ago when Clerks became a Sundance sensation, spawning a wave of imitators and knockoffs.
Still, even if his writing is more focused than it’s been in his last few outings, Smith’s return to the “counter-culture” remains, like most sequels, an imitation and a knockoff. In both a nod to the made-on-the-cheap æsthetic of the original film, as well as a perhaps unintentional homage to The Wizard of Oz, the new picture opens in black and white, as Dante shows up for work at the Quick Mart, which appears grimy and run-down. That’s to say, it looks the way it always has, except for the raging fire that’s sweeping through the store’s interior in vibrant Technicolor. Randal, showing up late, seems unmindful of the firefighters around him until a harsh reality sets in: “Shit, now where am I gonna bring chicks to fuck when my mother’s home?”
From here, the film adopts a colorful new palette, though David Klein’s lensing equals his work on the original Clerks in being quite unremarkable. For Smith, who worked with legendary cinematographer Vilmos Zsigmond (McCabe & Mrs. Miller) on the best-forgotten “Bennifer” vehicle Jersey Girl, this represents a step backward. True, he’s never demonstrated much understanding of the basics of cinematic presentation. After seven films, why would he start now?
The action picks up a year later, and we’re not in Kansas anymore. Dante and Randal are still clerks, but now they’re barely working behind the counter at Mooby’s, a bovine-themed fast-food franchise. (“It’s udderly delicious!”) Joining them is Elias (Trevor Fehrman), a 19-year-old dim reflection of their younger selves (his love for The Lord of the Rings provides ample fodder for Randal’s ribbing), and their reluctant manager, the adorable Becky Scott (Rosario Dawson, bringing desperately needed acting ability). Jay and Silent Bob (Jason Mewes and director Smith) have moved in out front, “new and improved” after six months in rehab, yet still selling dime bags.
It’s Dante’s last day before he moves to Florida to marry Emma (Jennifer Schwalbach Smith, the director’s wife), the hot girl who neglected him in high school. Of course, the screenplay makes it plain that he belongs with Becky (only in the movies, folks!) — and Randal.
At times uproarious in an “I can’t believe they just said that” kind of way, the film is steeped in Jersey Girl’s predictable family/romantic drama conventions. Can discussions of “ass to mouth” and depictions of “interspecies erotica” co-exist with Hallmark-level romance? Try as Smith did to convince, I just felt dirty, and strangely nonplussed.
