Much is made of Santorum's carrying 11 states in the GOP primaries, caucuses, and dwarf-tossing contests, or whatever they call them. But please, dear reader, remember that when the general election comes, they actually allow sane voters to participate.

P&J did have the chance to see Ricky's bailout live on TV, and want to alert Bravo, proud home and exploiter of the gargoyle genre of "reality" shows: looking at the family members behind Santorum during his implosion announcement, you could stock the cast of a new RuPaul's Appalachian Makeovers show in a heartbeat.

Ricky's family looks like it has done more inbreeding than the Kardashians — er, excuse us, the Kennedys, er, excuse us, the Borgias, er, excuse us, the Australopithecus, er . . . . (Stop the inbreeding jokes or we'll be in court — the Editors).


RADICAL POLITICS IN THE BIGGEST LITTLE, PART 1

Nice to see the always entertaining General Assembly back at work.

In the Senate, of course, the Rubbers and Spaccone affair has brought a little charge of excitement in recent weeks. The gang in the House, though, was not to be outdone. Hence the John "Stretch" McCauley/Bob Watson "clown car" debate on the floor last week.

According to the BeloJo's "Political Scene" column, this fracas broke out over a bill to establish a visitor's center at the State House, introduced by Representative McCauley to "sell Rhode Island souvenirs, distribute free information and serve as the starting point for guided tours" of the State House, as the BeloJo described it elsewhere.

When Democrat McCauley mentioned the "clown car" (the favored mode of transportation for solons at Halitosis Hall), Republican Watson — who took it as a reference to his recent arrests on drug possession charges — retorted that McCauley was in the same clown car, a thinly veiled reference to a visit by federal law enforcement last fall to his personal business office further up Smith Hill.

Of course, the empty beer cans and pot pipes in the Watson clown mobile seemed to indicate that there might have been a recent bipartisan meeting with the Rubbers contingent held inside the car. Who's to know?

Meanwhile, Representative Peter Palumbo, a master of clown car politics, introduced a bill to make riding with one's dog in one's lap illegal, with accompanying fines.

P&J wonder if, while wrestling with these weighty issues, our elected officials might have noticed that the state is rapidly going down the tubes.


RADICAL POLITICS IN THE BIGGEST LITTLE, PART 2

Speaking of man's best friend, your superior correspondents hope that all those who attended the Mitt Romney rally on Wednesday (scheduled just after the Phoenix's deadline) took the precaution of leaving their dogs at home, lest the presumptive Republican presidential candidate lash them to the roof of his car.

While the Romney visit and the word that another GOP candidate, Ron Paul, will be visiting next week are the stories receiving all the ink, there is another visit from a national candidate scheduled for this Friday, April 13.

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