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An intimate guide to dining in — and eating out — this Valentine's Day

Erotic Potluck


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ASSORTED FLAVORED CONDOMS ($VARIES | SWEET N' NASTY, GOOD VIBRATIONS, CONDOM WORLD)

The utility of flavored condoms is convoluted and often debated. Many say they're for enhancing blow jobs, while others claim they're geared for post-intercourse cunnilingus. Ultimately, the flavoring of latex contraceptives fails on both fronts, offering no readily identifiable palate pleasure. Although Glyde condoms are vegan friendly, and their vanilla is the only flavored condom we tried that wouldn't wrap a dick in some funky color, it really just smelled like rot. Trustex grape and mint taste more like their names, but the stench of latex is un-maskable. Not only do flavored condoms belong nowhere near a mouth, they offer no discernible pleasures for any erogenous zones.

Cassie: God help me if I ever have to encounter a vanilla-flavored condom again. Vile.
Alex: I am not convinced that any of these work as legitimate contraceptives. Unless you want a blueberry flavored baby, stick to Trojans. Did we mention that the vanilla flavor smelled like rot?
Ariel: I would rather fuck with Saran Wrap than be forced to smell one of these again.

WHERE TO STOCK UP FOR YOUR NAUGHTY NEEDS:

Sweet-N-Nasty: 90A Massachusetts Ave, Back Bay
Condom World: 332 Newbury St, Back Bay, Boston
Good Vibrations: 308A Harvard St, Coolidge Corner, Brookline
Hubba Hubba: 534 Massachusetts Ave, Central Square, Cambridge

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