Party like it's 1999

By CHRIS FARAONE  |  December 30, 2008

THE ROMNEY Requires one man, eight wives, and a bedside hair-goop dispenser.

ATTIRE
T-SHIRTS There are hundreds of designs to choose from; more militant cats might opt for "Next Stop, the Hague," while Sex and the City fans go for the pun-tastic "The End of an Error." Personally, I'll be wearing no shirt at all, since I'm an Obama-cheering nihilist.

OVER-THE-SHOULDER BARREL Show those Democrats that they're not the only ones suffering in these fiscally alarming times. In the Depression before this one, nothing said frugal chic like a barrel and suspenders. Of course, it's recommended to keep nearby a full camouflage get-up with Kevlar inserts for the inevitable ensuing civil warfare.

Chris Faraone is skipping New Year's Eve to plan his Question 2/HellObama celebration. Please RSVP tocfaraone@phx.com.

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