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Review: Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs

Pummeling awfulness
By ALICIA POTTER  |  July 1, 2009
1.0 1.0 Stars

 

Directed by Carlos Saldanha and Mike Thurmeier, the third go-round of the animated franchise — this time in 3-D — is as numbing as its geological era. Castrating mammoth Ellie (Queen Latifah) prepares to give birth. Meanwhile her helicopter husband (a grating Ray Romano) yammers about "priorities" and squabbles with his single saber-toothed-tiger pal (Denis Leary).

When the dipshit sloth (John Leguizamo) disappears after playing mom to three T-Rex babies, the gang descends into a sub-glacial world — and pure cinematic hell. Some Looney Tunes–type bits divert, yet they're lost in the script's pummeling awfulness. The parenthood platitudes are obnoxious enough, but gay jokes?

Try to mine a political or socio subtext all you like: the scariest raptor is named Rudy, and the proto-squirrel, once in love, loses his "nut." In the end, though, nothing can distract you from the desire to see these horrible characters suffer a quick extinction.

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