Don't tell me what to do

By AL DIAMON  |  February 29, 2012

Anyway, it's important we send somebody who can represent our views on the party platform, particularly to show support for planks against one-world government, Sharia law, and the unconstitutional federal income tax. Because those are the crucial issues for folks here in East Abunni.

Nominations? Shubb Dithersalot is nominated and seconded. I've checked the rules and can find nothing that excludes him from being a half delegate just because he died in that fireworks accident. In fact, it makes ol' Shubb an even better choice, because he won't go changing his mind when exposed to any facts. Also, he won't complain about reclining there with his upper torso in the parking lot.

Finally, it's time for this caucus's main event, the presidential straw poll. Before we cast our ballots, it's important to remind everyone that while there are many criteria to consider in making your choices for the most important office in the land, the one that we as Republicans should never take into account is electability. If we start down that primrose path, we're just going to end up with the likes of Snowe and Susan Collins in the Senate, Paul LePage in the Blaine House, and GOP majorities in the Legislature.

That's the kind of Republican Party Charlie Webster wants.

But it's not what we grassroots fruitcakes stand for. So don't let a little racism, sexism, homophobia, religious intolerance, perverted 19th-century moral values, or a grasp of science equivalent to that of serfs in the Middle Ages stop you from voting with your gut.

And please hurry up. Because as soon as this caucus adjourns, it's officially Easter in East Abunni. No matter what the one-world-government calendar says.

Hop to it and email comments to aldiamon@herniahill.net.

< prev  1  |  2  | 
  Topics: Talking Politics , Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul,  More more >
| More


Most Popular
ARTICLES BY AL DIAMON
Share this entry with Delicious
  •   DEAD CAN DANCE  |  April 23, 2014
    In nearly every way, the residents of cemetery row have to be considered superior endorsers when compared to the living.
  •   IT'S THE MONEY THAT MATTERS  |  April 16, 2014
    The average Maine voter, defined for purposes of this column as someone closely resembling me, has concluded that the current legislative session has been a disaster.
  •   GREEN BEHIND THE EARS  |  April 10, 2014
    Outside of an infestation in Portland’s city government and a sprinkling of midcoast activists protesting stuff that probably won’t happen anyway, the party isn’t really part of the debate.
  •   FOLLY OF YOUTH  |  April 03, 2014
    We now know what’s to blame for the decrepit condition of Maine’s economy.
  •   RETURN OF THE KING  |  March 28, 2014
    Democrats in the Maine Legislature need either John Martin or Vladimir Putin.

 See all articles by: AL DIAMON