Carter’s cajones

Jimmy makes Dubya look like a wimp
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  October 27, 2008

Perhaps the weirdest phenomenon of the current US political climate is how Republicans swagger like they’re a bunch of tough guys, implying that Democrats are effete wimps. The reality of the Mr. Man situation is this: the Republican Party is rife with classic wimps and bullies.
 
Comic blowhard Rush Limbaugh, a wholly owned subsidiary of the Republican Party, has been fulminating about “fake soldiers.” This radio comic and corporate stooge, who never spent a day in the Armed Forces (neither have P+J, but we’re not cheerleading a war), says that veterans who disagree with the Bush administration approach are somehow phonies and not patriotic enough.
 
Meanwhile Big Boy Bush, the master strategist with absolutely no combat experience, a guy who had visited perhaps less than a half-dozen other countries prior to being named president in the 2000 election fiasco, tells us that the US does not torture people, despite all evidence to the contrary.
 
He’s a liar, a bully, and a ruthless moron, since there is no clear evidence that torture is effective in getting useful information. But, of course, you can’t be a war criminal if you’re the Head Ramrod of the USA, all evidence (once again) to the contrary.
  
So who turns up as the real Mr. Man last week? It would be none other than octogenarian former president Jimmy Carter, even though the vast majority of rightward-thinking Americans consider him an ineffectual wimp. In the real world last week, the 83-year-old former prez got into an in-your-face shouting match in Darfur, one of the most dangerous places in the world, when some Sudanese security officers blocked him from meeting with refugees of the Darfur conflict.
 
“You don’t have the power to stop me!” Carter yelled at the armed security goons, before the rest of his delegation got him out of there. And unlike Rummy or Bush, or any of the other big warrior-leaders, Carter was not accompanied by dozens of armed bodyguard types, just a very small entourage.
 
P&J are sick and tired of this upside-down Republican vision of reality, in which a man with cojones, like Carter, is portrayed as a wimp, and bullies and chicken hawks like Bush are somehow perceived as brave. Brave for having people tortured? Brave for committing American troops, other people’s children, to put their lives on the line, so that he can find some political and (he wishes) future cover for one of the biggest foreign policy blunders in US history?

Baby needs a new accountant
P+J don’t have business degrees, but we do know a hummer when we see one.
 
Was it just your superior correspondents who noticed some interesting facts in the New York Times’ Sunday story about lottery ticket sales and the amount of revenue that goes to education in various states?
 
Coincidentally, the lottery was introduced here years ago with false promises of how it would help education. Yet what jumped out in the Times’ story is how even though the Biggest Little ranked 10th nationally in per-capita lottery ticket sales, and second, to Massachusetts, in payout, our net revenue placed last in the country. Excuse us, but isn’t making money the core premise of the Lot?
 
So we are paying out, big time, and profiting the least. There’s a good business model. Phillipe + Jorge would love to see the numbers for “administration,” as our high-prize returns can’t be the only cherry in this game. Perhaps that should be a target for the Big Audit, or is that still MIA, for all intents and purposes?

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