Hands of stone

By MATT TAIBBI  |  January 16, 2008

So what happened to Stephens after the NFL? Well, among other things, he got arrested in 1994 for carrying a concealed weapon in Florida, a run-of-the-mill Desert Eagle .50-cal handgun-tucked-on-the-floorboard arrest. Earlier that same year, there was a rape charge involving a woman in a Kansas City hotel (in fact, this charge led to his release from his last team, the Chiefs). He was convicted of sexual assault (rather than the original charge of rape) in 1996, and was required to serve five years’ probation, as well as register as a sex offender. That leads us to today: in 2007, Stephens became a fugitive when he failed to update his sex-offender registration with authorities in East Texas and western Louisiana. But finally, toward the middle of December, he was apprehended in Greenwood, Louisiana, and now will face failure-to-register charges in the Lone Star state.

So add Stephens, Graham, and Sauerbrun to the list of ex-Pats who’ve been in bracelets recently — a list that also includes Chad Eaton (investigation of domestic violence), Ted Johnson (domestic violence), and punter-for-a-minute Danny Baugher (punching his dad). It’s notable that all were off the team before they got arrested, as the Patriots continue to be one of the most arrest-free franchises in sports.

First in blunt
We’ve had a few more weed/blunt arrests lately — there was a surprising deficiency for a while, though I believe it was really a diagnostic problem more than anything else, with police not knowing the difference between a joint and a blunt. Well, they sure know now, as a pair of Tennessee Volunteers football players named Gerald Jones and Ahmad Paige got arrested for smoking up a potential recruit this past week. Police noticed the smell of smoke coming from their car after the duo was pulled over for a burned-out tag light. Police then reportedly found one half-smoked “marijuana cigar” in the front seat along with an un-smoked marijuana cigar. One of two back-seat passengers, Jameel Owens, was a potential football recruit looking at the campus.

The two Vols got simple possession charges, and the passengers were released.

When he’s not googling “house arrest” and “unwelcome ex-Patriots,” Matt Taibbi writes for Rolling Stone. He can be reached atM_Taibbi@yahoo.com.

THE TALLY FOR THIS YEAR
JIM LEYRITZ (EX-YANKEES) | DUI manslaughter | 90
JOHN STEPHENS (EX-PATRIOTS) | sex-assault fugitive | 48
DAVID CORNACCHIA (FLA. EVERBLADES) | mid-flight assault, head-butting bystanders, exposing wine-shrunken wiener | 46
DANIEL GRAHAM (BRONCOS) | ambiguous domestic-violence beef; hit a bedpost | 30
GERALD JONES AND AHMAD PAIGE (TENNESSEE) | Cheech and Chong/Up in Smoke impersonation, while in car | 12
DEMARCUS GRANGER (OKLAHOMA) | stealing winter coat — in Arizona | 11
SHAUN WHITE (X-TREME SPORTS) | spraying fire extinguisher, acting like the little douchebag he is | 11

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