Man, talk about a meme that won't die! Just one week after this column rehashed at length the veritable swarm of ex–New England Patriots gone over to crime in '09, the New Year brings us yet another old friend gone bad — the troubled, fleet-of-foot, ultimately disappointing wideout Terry Glenn, who this past week got himself arrested for boosting, of all things, a Chevy Suburban.
Granted, Glenn has had a rough life, plagued by terrible luck both off and on the field (where injuries derailed what should have been a memorable career). He was extremely poor growing up (his childhood home in Columbus, Ohio, was apparently often without heat or electricity), and was orphaned at age 13 after his mother was murdered by a stalker. He went on to become a star receiver at Ohio State, joining the tradition of big-time OSU receivers like Joey Galloway, Cris Carter, and David Boston.
(There's probably no one single position in all of sports more cursed than that of "former Ohio State wide receiver." Current Pittsburgh Steelers star Santonio Holmes has made headlines for pot busts and other incidents — google "Santonio Holmes naked" if you want a follow-up; Boston got busted for a DUI, steroids, and for assaulting an airport ticket agent; Carter flunked multiple drug tests; Ken-Yon Rambo got racked up on weed charges; and Ray Small got suspended by Buckeyes coach Jim Tressel for violating team rules.)
Almost immediately upon entering the NFL, Glenn caused controversy — even when it wasn't his fault: Bob Kraft's insistence on drafting him seventh overall in the 1996 draft was the move that finally soured Bill Parcells on Kraft and the Patriots (the Tuna wanted Simeon Rice). Parcells, in his inimitably friendly way, treated Glenn to a monstrous welcome, famously dismissing him as "she" when the soft-spoken receiver came up lame with a training-camp hamstring injury.
Glenn stayed on in Foxboro for six years before bouncing around a bit — the Packers and Cowboys were among his post-Pats destinations — and along the way he racked up a number of arrests. He got hit with a battery charge in 2001 for assaulting the mother of his child, and in 2005 he got arrested for public intoxication for, among other things, taking a leak outside a fast-food restaurant. Last February, he got picked up on a weed-and-public-intoxication charge after he reportedly pulled an Otis Nixon and was seen roaming the hallways of an Irving, Texas, hotel naked.
His latest charge is an odd one. Glenn apparently wrecked his Bentley some weeks ago, and in the meantime rented a Suburban from a National Car Rental office in Dallas. It's not clear what happened next, but at some point National called the police to report the SUV stolen. Glenn was supposedly on his way to return the vehicle when he was pulled over by police and booked for auto theft.
Glenn is claiming that his insurance company told him to rent the car, and that they should have been paying the bill. Moreover, his attorney, Luis Vera, claims that National had Glenn's credit card all along and could have paid the bill at any time.