October 09, 2008
(Photo by Robert Stolarik for the New York Times.)
News about the famed, mysterious, prolific, trend-setting, point-making, globe-trotting street artist Banksy has been abundant in the past few months. In July, the Mail on Sunday published an annoyingly smug article, outing the artist as Robin Gunningham, "perhaps all too predictably, a former public schoolboy brought up in [the] middle-class suburbia" of Bristol, in the United Kingdom. (A middle-class public school kid created street art?! How dare he?) Their verdict relied mainly on this photo, of a man believed to be Banksy painting in Jamaica four years ago, and on interviews with friends of Robin Gunningham - none of whom actually came out and said the guy is Banksy. "Naturally, Banksy denied the picture was of him. Indeed, as we
discovered, Banksy and those close to him tend to deny everything," the Mail complains. (Ha! Banksy: 1, Mail on Sunday: ...sort of also 1)
Unfazed by this attempt at cramping his style, Banksy went to New Orleans in August, around the third anniversary of Hurricane Katrina, and planted a dozen or so pieces of artwork on the streets. The Times-Picayune and NOLA.com put together an excellent video of these works, and local reactions to them, watch it here. Unfortunately, one of Banksy's pieces has already been painted over entirely - apparently not all New Orleaners were psyched on a world-famous street artists coming to town.
Then, rumors swirled around New York City, after a very Banksy-like mural of a rat in a "I ♥ NY" t-shirt surfaced at Grand and Wooster Streets. "Has the elusive British graffiti artist Banksy struck New York again?" the Times wondered. (Maybe they should have consulted Vermin or Pest Control. According to Artnet News. "a controversial new organization, a group named Vermin,
was established to authenticate Banksy’s Street Art works for the art
market -- without the artist’s approval -- in competition with Pest Control, the authentication body headed by Holly Cushing and operating with Bansky’s okay." (Emphasis not mine.) Two groups are needed to authenticate his work? And one without his permission? It's no wonder Banksy flees from England so often. They can't seem to cut the guy a break.)
So! Today, the Phoenix's beloved music editor Michael Brodeur alerted me to the fact that, indeed, Banksy has struck New York again, and not just with the rat mural. The Times reports today:
"On Wednesday a Banksy piece was unveiled at 89 Seventh Avenue South (near Bleecker Street) in Greenwich Village.
This one is not a mural but an installation: a mock pet supply shop,
filled with animatronic creatures like a rhesus monkey and would-be
creatures like fish sticks swimming in a tank. The Village Pet Store
and Charcoal Grill, as the green awning reads, is Banksy’s first
official exhibition in New York, his representatives say, and it will
be open to the public daily through Oct. 31."
Wooster Collective says: "A clear departure form last year's behemoth show in Los Angeles, Banksy's first ever show in New York City (the others have been fakes) is being held in a tiny storefront that's less than 300 square feet and can't hold more than 20 people at any one time.
One of our favorite things about what Banksy has done is that the entire show is completely visible to the public both day and night through the store front windows. And unless you're a hard core Banksy fan, or until someone like us tells you, it's absolutely impossible to know that the work has been done by Banksy. There are no paintings or graffiti in the entire space."
The Times, Gothamist, and Wooster Collective all have a bevy of photos from the installation posted on their respective sites but, Wooster Collective warns: "still images don't do the place justice!"
I say: time for a road trip to New York City?
Related:
"Where Fish Sticks Swim Free and Chicken Nuggets Self-Dip" [NYT]
"Banksy's Village Pet Store and Grill" [Gothamist]
"The "Village Pet Store And Charcoal Grill" Opens in New York City [Wooster Collective]
October 09, 2008
Despite her being the prettiest vice-presidential
candidate in American history since John Edwards, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin
has yet to win affection from the lesbian community. And here’s the real
surprise: she doesn’t care much for them either.
According to a press release from
Alaskans Together for Equality, gay rights advocates were “heartened” that, in
this past week’s vice-presidential debate, Palin called for tolerance regarding
“adults in America
choosing their partners [and] choosing relationships that they deem best for
themselves.” They were so enthralled, in fact, that they asked her to formally
acknowledge National Coming Out Day.
Palin not-so-respectfully
declined, stating: “I’d rather see my slut daughter get inseminated by a pot
smoking degenerate Democrat than acknowledge lesbian and gay rights.” Well, not
exactly, but she did manage to insult some folks by remaining silent.
“We were asking the Governor to
acknowledge and recognize the dignity of openly-gay Alaskans,” said Alaskans Together
President Marsha Buck, who pointed out that this year Palin already proclaimed “Careers
in Construction Week,” “10th Annual Christian Heritage Week,” “Alaska
Taiwan Friendship Week,” and “Breastfeeding Awareness Month.”
Props to Alaskans Together for
further reminding us of what a hateful goon Sarah Palin is, but if Republicans
start jokingly referring to each other as “Gay Alaskans” around the country
club locker room, don’t say you didn’t bring it on yourself.
October 09, 2008
Thank Satan that those
scum-sucking liberals run Hollywood.
If creative feats were left to righties, then there might be more flicks like An
American Carol, which I saw last night. You might ask why I would endure such
pain – especially since The Phoenix already reviewed the unanimously (although
conspiratorially) panned conservative comedy. The answer is twofold: 1 – I was
called out yesterday for alleging that the David Zucker (of Airplane! fame) film
wasn’t funny even though I hadn’t seen it; and 2 – a quick Google search
revealed that Boston's Young Republicans were congregating at Loews for a screening.
On my way down I was hoping that the film had already
been exiled to DVD; not because I think it can swing voters, or because I didn’t
genuinely want to see it, but because buying tickets promised to be more embarrassing
than purchasing that Coldplay disc for mom last Christmas. But upon arrival I
realized that the trip was worthwhile; where else in Boston could I spy on a herd of nerds whose
high school rejection inspired them to loathe those of us who think, drink and
fornicate liberally.
I spotted the awkward looking persecuted
neo-cons as soon as I walked in, which forced me to conceal my pad and pen;
these people don’t much like press these days, and I’ll eat shit before I get
beaten by a swarm of preppies on my own turf. That said; there was one uncharacteristically
wicked hot chick with the
group who I presume is a talking head in training. One overweight couple also
walked in with armfuls of candy, but, while they appeared to be generic couch
potato rednecks, they left after the first 15 minutes.
Once inside the theater, the
audio cut out for a minute during a snack bar commercial, which fueled the
first round of forced laughs when one attendee suggested: “They’re censoring our
sound.” That one got the kind of “Ha” chuckle that simply indicates one’s understanding
of a joke’s intention; not the sort of “Yee-Has” that express sheer enjoyment.
This continued through the entire evening.
Carol is stocked with conservative
Hollywood heavyweights including Jon Voight, Dennis Hopper, and Kelsey Grammer,
as well as crack house leftovers who would take gigs fluffing for Monsters of
Cock (I would provide the link, but it’s pretty awful stuff). Among the
Z-listers: David Alan Grier, Paris Hilton, some guy who does a deplorable JFK
accent, Gary Coleman (no joke), that guy who played Shooter McGavin in Happy Gilmore,
and Chris Farley’s brother, Kevin, who plays the cleverly named Michael Moore
caricature, Michael Malone.
Of course there’s some hilarity;
one rip at the beginning suggests that too many Arabs are named “Muhammad;” that’s
when Carol is at its best – when it’s deliberately anti-intellectual and even hateful.
Farley also plays a decent Moore,
even though at times it seems like he’s playing his big brother. Beyond those
merits, this is a remarkable hack job; even the absurd premise – that
documentary filmmaker Malone wants to abolish the 4th of July
because he hates America
– was likely jacked from Mr. Show with Bob and David’s classic “America Will
Blow up the Moon” sketch.
In order to save you the long-winded
synopsis of this Pro-Life abortion, which you can get here in Ty Burr’s excellent
review if you’re interested, I’ll instead identify the underlying themes and
lessons in An American Carol:
-Michael Moore is a fat shit who can’t
go eight minutes without inhaling pizza.
-Documentary filmmaking as a
genre is a complete joke; especially ones that are about Nazism,
McCarthyism, or any other topics for which the verdict has clearly been decided on.
-If it were up to Michael Moore –
and everyone else who believes that Iraq
was and is the wrong war – America
would have never fought the Civil War or World War II.
-Foreign dictators only
understand strength.
-Columbia University
professors are hippies in disguise who are bent on “indoctrinating an entire
generation to hate their own country.”
-Michael Moore is a complete
failure; such a failure, in fact, that Zucker made a feature film to ridicule
him.
-Bill O’Reilly is fantastic at
playing himself playing that bigot-bating rabble rouser who he plays on air.
If Dennis Miller wasn’t proof
enough that even funny dudes lose comic steam once they turn right, then Zucker
is the deciding factor. Homeboy deployed every brand of comedy to hammer home
his point – from slapstick and satire to musical numbers and flagrant mockery –
yet few succeeded (apparently some maverick producers are calling for a costly
humor surge in the sequel).
I’m sick with curiosity about whether notable screen heroes such as Hopper, Grammer, and James Woods (yeah –
him too, sorry) would be useless if not constantly surrounded by
Tinsel Town semi-rationalists. In the end, the most chuckle-worthy thing about this debacle
(at least for me, since I didn’t know that Voight is a Republican) was
realizing that even Brad Pitt has a conservative asshole for a father-in-law.
The only other highlight that I enjoyed was how, near the end, when faced with the
choice between death and patriotism, Michael Moore finds his conscience and
seeks redemption from the true Americans who he regrettably smeared en route to
notoriety. The crowd seemed to like that one too; probably because it reminded the Reaganites of the real-life Lee Atwater story.
October 08, 2008
There are some stories that no reporter should ever have to cover objectively, and yesterday's rift between off-duty police officers and civilian flaggers is definitely one of them. I give props to the Globe and Herald for trying, though, as it must have been difficult to avoid mocking police officers who for years pocketed extraordinary amounts of detail dough to talk on cell phones were ironically interfering with traffic and harassing people while hollering that Governor Patrick doesn't care about safety. Personally, I would be incapable of covering this without accusing them of being greedy bastards.
Be sure to check today's Globe article, as well as the Herald article on line - the more than 300 combined reader comments show where Commonwealth residents stand on this one. Also - if anybody out there knows someone who agrees with the police on this issue - and who isn't a cop or someone who is financially attached to and/or in love with and/or being blackmailed by a police officer - please have them email me (cfaraone@phx.com), as I would love to post that interview right here on the Phlog.
October 08, 2008
With Sarah Palin constantly
setting up tug and blow job jokes with lines about removing gloves and applying
lipstick, only one diversion can lasso my comic attention: John McCain’s age. I
wasn’t going to exploit for political purposes Barack Obama’s opponent’s
senility and malfeasance, but, after last night’s debate, I’m compelled to
graduate from sexism to ageism. Boobs who were upset by my calling Palin a
bitch on Friday should sit this one out; here go 10 New Reasons Why John
McCain Is Too Old To Be President:
10 – He could barely shake Obama’s
hand. I know it’s a war-related injury, but what if shipwreck has to press flesh
with a really tall foreign leader?
9 – The turning signal on the
Straight Talk Express is always blinking regardless of whether McCain is
changing lanes.
8 – Just hearing the word eBay clunk
off McCain’s tongue was less comfortable than watching Obama say “mammogram.”
7 – I know I’ve said this before,
but McCain really looks like Dan Aykroyd’s character in "Nothing But Trouble" – Judge
Alkin Valkenheiser.
6 – Instead of poking with relevant
jabs wrapped in modern frameworks, McCain compared Obama’s tax policies to
Jell-O. Even that conservative Nazi Bill Cosby thought that joke was flat and
dated.
5 – McCain only remembers the
part of Vietnam
when he was held captive – not the part about him flying over villages and dropping
bombs.
4 – At times McCain can’t distinguish
between Barack Obama’s first and surnames. At one point this past night he
referred to the Illinois
senator as “Obama,” clearly forgetting that was his last name.
3 – McCain admittedly doesn’t “know
what all of us don’t know.” You must be losing it to allege to know that.
2 – He predicted that in the near
future “we’re going to be talking about countries that we don’t know where they
are on a map.” Maybe it’s more geographic ignorance than old age, but that’s
just about the most unsettling line so far this season.
1 – The last nugget to spill from
McCain’s jowls was: “We need a steady hand at the tiller.” Do I really have to extrapolate
here? Was that changed from “steady hand at the cotton gin” at the last minute
to add some contemporary flare?
I’m looking forward
to the hate mail and phone calls that I’ll no doubt receive from those of you
who serve this country but who hate folks such as me who don’t like watching you
die in senseless wars. In fact, I would even ask conservatives to lash back with
their own 10 Reasons Why Barack Obama Is Too Young – or Too Black – To Be
President list, but they’re a humorless bunch; just go see “An American Carol,”
or, better yet, read the comments that are sure to pile up below.
October 07, 2008
It's been done before by others, but nowhere yet (that I can find) for tonight's debate. So here you go - employing the efforts of Wordle on the debate transcript (using CNN's near-real-time one)
McCain:
Obama:
October 07, 2008
There’s an important use for the Obama campaign’s text-message database
that’s not being discussed, and it’s a way to help prevent the Republicans from
stealing the election.
We know that Barack Obama’s campaign has done a much better
job at getting people’s cell-phone numbers, from his various text-message
initiatives (including the contest at the DNC to see which state would send in
the most text
messages).
We don’t know what, exactly, they plan to do with them. They
used them to announce his pick of Joe Biden for veep, but it’s been pretty
quiet since.
My guess - and it’s not an earth-shattering one - is that
the campaign will send out a huge blast text
message on Election Day, reminding people to go to the polls and vote.
But they need to go one step further,
to help ensure the validity of the voting - in that text
reminding people to vote, they need to ask people to text
the campaign back, to confirm that they did vote for Obama.
That way, the campaign will have a rough tally of at least a
minimum number of people who cast their votes for Obama
in each state. (Sure, some folks will have area codes from states other than
where they live, but this is not an exact count.)
The election is likely to end up very close in several key
states around the country. Imagine if the Obama
campaign had its own rough count of how many people there voted for him. It
wouldn’t be an exit poll, nor actual ballots, but a minimum number of people
who said they voted for Obama. This will
definitely be an underestimate of the votes Obama should get - not everyone who
votes for Obama will have gotten a text in the
first place, and among those who do get a text, not everyone will reply.
Now imagine that the official ballot count ends up saying
that fewer people voted for Obama than texted
the Obama campaign to say they did - or even
that the official results are very close to the number of those who texted.
Rather than being stuck trying to guess - based on exit
polls or other demographic data - whether the count is likely valid or not, the
Obama campaign will have its own independent
data.
And that data will include information allowing the campaign
to actually contact individual
voters to let them know what’s going on - to get them involved in the effort to
challenge the results, if need be, or to take any other action that might be
appropriate.
This may not be an important move in many (or even most)
states, but in some battleground states it could make a vital difference.
And of course the McCain campaign (or any third-party
campaign) could use the same tactic to ensure accuracy in voter counts, if only
they had a database anything like the size of Obama’s.
October 03, 2008
As found here.
October 03, 2008
A TRULY TERRIBLE HAND
5 years ago
October 3, 2003 | Mocking the Defense Department’s method of educating soldiers about Sadam Hussein’s minions with a deck of cards, North Shore illustrator John Doherty teamed up with media critic Arthur E. Rowse to create their own set, except this one was devoted to Bush and his minions.
"...Once they’d decided which panjandrums to include, they had to assign each a place in the regal hierarchy. Some were easy, like Cheney and Bush as jokers. Or like the four queens: National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice pumping gas in a boiler suit (queen of diamonds); former EPA chief Christine Todd Whitman drawn in front of soot-spewing smokestacks (queen of spades); Secretary of the Interior Gale Norton grinning maniacally and brandishing a chain saw (queen of clubs); and anti-gay demagogue US Senator Rick Santorum, stroking an anxious-looking pooch (queen of hearts). " Read Full article
TOKE THAT COPPERS
10 years ago
October 2, 1998 | Jason Gay reported on the coming pot rally in Boston Common.
"Now in it’s ninth year, the rally is the largest pro-marijuana event in the country and perhaps in the world. It is unquestionably one of the biggest events on the Common in the past 20 years, with crowds surpassed only by events like Pope John Paul II’s 1979 prayer mass, which drew a spectacular half-million people. In Boston, fittingly, only the pope outdraws pot.
"...Rally organizers believe that protesting a bad law requires flouting it, so this year - as in years past - there will be lots of audience participation in the form of joints, blunts, pipes and one-hitters. By midafternoon, it is expected, the air above the Common will be thick with smoke and the sweet, pungent odor of cannabis.
"Not surprisingly, this mass lawbreaking irritates the city’s political and law-enforcement establishment, which has spent the past several years waging a very public war against Mass Cann and the Freedom Rally...Last year, police swarmed the festival, arresting 150 people for marijuana possession - a haul that filled the city’s jails."
HORROR STORIES
25 years ago
October 4, 1983 | Alan Lupo will be missed, indeed.
"A long time ago, when my job included churning out one police story after another, I teletyped in a nightly frenzy of gore, manmade and natural disasters, near-misses, auto crashes, drownings, hunting accidents, shootings, stabbings...You get inured to it, but occasionally a story was so horrible that even in the midst of trying to make a deadline, I’d stop...And sometimes, I am not ashamed to say, sometimes, contrary to every dictate of the business and defiant of all the macho bullshit that comes with the trade, sometimes I would cry.
"I remember still, 21 years after the incident, the story of a family going home after a vacation, of the drunken driver who drove his auto across the median strip into the lane of oncoming traffic and smashed into that family’s car. A child died...Two decades and a year later, and I wonder how the rest of the family has lived all these years with that one terrible moment...
"Since then, there have been other stories, stories that some might consider to be of greater importance because they involve more people, whole nations sometimes. But I have come to realize that they really aren’t more important. They are bigger because they involve more people, but not more important than the stuff that comes over the phone from the patrolman or sergeant. They are all important for their common denominators -- the unnecessary loss of life and the mutilation of both body and spirit.
"Some journalists escape such stories by covering space shuttles, or organic farming, or the America’s Cup. The rest of us don’t know any better and go back time and time again to the business of brutality."
NO SHIT
35 years ago
October 2, 1973 | There was a time in Boston when you could get a house for a dollar...
"With the frontier having gone as far West as it can, its romance seems now to be reappearing in the wide-open, unclaimed spaces of Boston’s three-family homes, Philadelphia’s and Wilmington’s (Del.) rowhouses, and even in Newark. All those cities are in various stages of implementing urban homesteading, in which city frontiersmen, preferably possessed of good carpenter’s tools and not representing big developers, would be given, for a dollar, abandoned buildings owned by the city. Like the 1862 Homestead Act, which allowed squatters to take title to an acreage on which they’d built a home and lived for five years, urban homesteaders would live five years tax-free on the promise of rehabilitating the dwelling. In Boston, that amounts to a $7000 tax break."
--Compiled by Peter Piatetsky
October 03, 2008
I’m glad that we
– meaning those of us who are intelligent enough to dismiss today’s New York
Times nonsense that Sarah Palin delivered an honorable performance in last
night’s debate – have finally arrived at the moment when I can spit trash about
Alaska’s shameful governor without being labeled a complete misogynist. For
real – fuck this bitch if she has beef with my debt; I hope her son gets filled
with shrapnel in this war that she supports so ardently (you thought it – I
said it).
For an event as
entertaining as last night’s vice-presidential debate promised to be, the
Drinking Liberally meet-up groups from Brookline
and Boston convened with our intellectual
superiors from Cambridge at the Hong Kong in Harvard
Square. I thought it was a fine choice considering
how The Comedy Studio is upstairs and we were in for an evening of hilarity.
The joint was
filled with assorted liberals – one young woman was toting a copy of Richard
Dawkins’ “The Selfish Gene;” another was passing out Hebrew Obama stickers. Apparently
there are few rallying points more persuasive than Sarah Palin’s stupidity. The
camaraderie made me feel badly about my general prejudice against people
wearing dress suits; I apologize for always scowling at you in the street – I
often forget that some of you are lefties too.
By 8:15 the room
was nearly swollen; Palin Bingo cards were strewn across the bar and tables,
and the folks from Generation Progress incestuously amplified the spot with a
mess of Democratic literature. It was a polite crowd – at least at first.
There were no
boos during Palin’s introduction; equally disappointing was the lack of cheers
for Biden. One person joked that the governess was wearing black to mock Gwen
Ifill, but the line was largely denied in a moment of cautious liberalism.
I’m not sure how
people in other settings perceived the stage set-up, but with a crowd around me
ripping Palin to shreds I saw that red carpet as a cautionary GOP measure to
prevent viewers from seeing her blood spatter on the dance floor.
The liberal
drinkers got ruthless as soon as the word “soccer” flipped off Palin’s jaw. She
further agitated folks by saying “barometer” several times in the first few
minutes, since that word was not featured on the Palin Bingo cards. That said;
we were all flattered to learn that we belong to the greatest workforce in the
world.
Props must be
given to a candidate who says “Joe Six-Pack” in a serious debate, and boy did
Palin get hers. Hollers rang when she said “feds” instead of “fed,” when she
big-upped the world famous Castro brothers, and after she clarified that Alaska was not just any
state, but a state that is in a country. Biden got his roars too; that “bridge
to nowhere” line brought the damn house down.
To the makers of
Palin Bingo: thanks for the laughs, but a few things: 1 – How could you forget “Predator
Lenders;” 2 – are you allowed to cross off “Track” when she says “track record;”
and 3 – next time we need cards for both candidates and the moderator. You
might also want to consider that Palin has improved her metaphorical capacity;
did anybody else notice how she said global warming doesn’t exist without really
saying so?
I’m glad that
Palin didn’t succumb to talk radio pressure and grill Ifill about her upcoming
book on Barack Obama. However, it would have been acceptable if she blasted the
PBS hostess for wearing what might be the ugliest blouse I’ve ever seen. That
thing was just horrible.
By half way
through the debate people were simply yapping over Palin; I suppose the
mentality was that if she could talk about whatever she wanted to, we could as
well. We still caught gaffes such as when she said “humanitarian” and “us” in
the same sentence, when she suggested that America
won Vietnam,
and when she dropped the oxymoron “team of mavericks,” but the novelty was
largely worn by the time they dipped into foreign policy.
There were some
moments that stuck out in the company of my drunken liberal cronies. The first
was when the candidates tag teamed China,
which was pretty uncomfortable since we were at the Hong
Kong. The second was when Palin denied homosexuals their civil
rights; where else in the country does a room full of people unanimously cheer
for gay pride? Third was their joint fellating of Israel; half of us were
disappointed in Biden, and the other half was ashamed to agree with dumb shit
on something.
The last thing
written in my notepad was: “I can’t stand how both sides always declare victory
as soon as the debate is over. I wonder if the Republicans will have the sack
to claim that Palin won.” But this morning I checked the latest headline on
McCain’s prehistoric web site: “Tonight, Governor Palin proved beyond any doubt
that she is ready to lead as Vice President of the United States.” Clearly the author
of that nonsense wasn’t watching over Bud Lights and scorpion bowls at the Hong
Kong in Cambridge.
October 02, 2008
We're not totally sure who is responsible for this, but it's brilliant.
Here's a sample:
"Gosh." Amazing.Get your own cards here: http://palinbingo.com/
Feel free to join us in the comments section to play along with the debate as it's happening -- we'll be in there as well. Ready? Annnnnnnnd . . . . we're off!
October 01, 2008
If you have beef with harsh immigration policies, so-called Wall Street bailouts, or right wing goon supreme Antonin Scalia, then downtown Boston was your liberal Disneyland Wednesday afternoon. From the 4pm Massachusetts Jobs with Justice rally against the bailout plan to the 5pm Moral Voices for Immigration Reform event, there was nary a southpaw cause that went unrepresented.
I initially showed for the Jobs with Justice melee – not because I’m hungry like daily news reporters for human faces to attach to the financial crisis, but because their press release mentioned the insultingly played out “Main Street” cliché five times. I respect peoples’ right to protest measures that they perceive to burden working people with corporate woes, but this sudden slogan-driven populism eerily reminds me of the reflexive blue state pacifism that followed 9/11. At the time, few people knew exactly why we should avoid conflict in Iraq, but virtually everyone was certain we should stay out. Maybe history will prove that in this case – as it has with our military quagmire – that the lefty sheeple were indeed correct. But until that verdict drops it’s unbearable to watch them picket what they barely know about.
That said; Jobs with Justice Executive Director Russ Davis brought an honorable message, telling the few dozen protesters that they shouldn’t blindly bite the bailout bill just because Capitol Hill power brokers are rushing through the process. He was simply there to convince working folks that they shouldn’t settle, and to remind them that their pressure helped stall legislative progress so far. Even though he thanked congressmen Lynch, Tierney and Delahunt for helping block the bailout plan, Davis displayed no grudge against Barney Frank for ushering the bill through the House of Representatives, where it was ultimately defeated.
Other Jobs with Justice headliners included the Raging Grannies, who performed a cute new number titled “No Stinking Bailout for Wall Street Bums,” as well as a bishop with a hot pink yarmulke, and former Green Rainbow Party gubernatorial hopeful Grace Ross, who unleashed a torrent of “Bail Out Main Street” rants (I’m assuming she’s not referring to Main Street in Newton, East Hampton, Bel-Air or Lake Forest). Ross also pitched one of those harsh accusations that I would bet a toe is inaccurate: “There’s not a single economist who thinks this plan would be effective,” she said.
With a half-hour to kill before the immigration reform protest, I stepped toward Quincy Market for a corn dog when I noticed a gang of rich folks and well-dressed yuppies standing outside the Great Hall. Playing reporter, I approached a cute girl guarding the entrance, which she told me was restricted to those with invitations. What she didn’t inform me of – and which I soon after learned from a woman mounting what appeared to be a solo protest – was that Supreme Court Justice Scalia was scheduled to deliver a speech there. Had I remembered to pay my Federalist Society dues on time – or at least confessed my affection for prehistoric Constitutional interpretations – I might have been invited. But I wasn’t even told what was happening; I suppose she noticed my generic apparel and contrarian perma-scowl and determined that I’m hardly an admirer.
The highlight of the day was the immigration rally, and not just because there was live entertainment other than non-profit prophets and leftover hippies. A guitar-strumming woman sang heartfelt songs about rednecks and law enforcement agents who terrorize immigrants, while a few hundred supporters held signs representing everything from Bikes Not Bombs to the SEIU. Obama buttons were mandatory; if I had five bucks for every piece of Barack flare pinned on someone’s hat, I might be able to bail out Wall Street – and Main Street – by myself.
The central message that came from immigration reformers is an important one: There must be a moratorium set on Immigration and Customs Enforcement (better known as I.C.E.) operations such as this past year’s raid at the Michael Bianco Inc. factory in New Bedford, where 300 federal agents detained more than 300 illegal workers and separated many from their families by relocating them to Texas without consulting Governor Patrick. In a powerful moment, Massachusetts Immigrant & Refugee Advocacy Coalition (MIRA) Director of Communications Shuya Ohno told savage stories of immigrant mistreatment that could have gotten even the most intolerant Jeff Foxworthy fan choked up. It’s too bad the network and cable news crews packed their microphones and cameras after they got their bailout rally sound bytes.
Lastly, while down there I met William Leonard, the Socialist Workers Party candidate opposing Sonia Chang-Diaz – and Dianne Wilkerson – for the latter’s Second Suffolk State Senate district seat. He’s a hella mild tempered dude who wasn’t hanging out for community brownie points; I bet that Leonard, a full-time meat packer and long-time activist, would have been there regardless of political aspirations. We spoke briefly, and in our short conversation I realized that there are more important issues in his race than Wilkerson’s shady finances. Expect to hear more about him in the coming weeks; Leonard plans to canvass his enormous district as best he can, and I’ll be tailing him under the presumption that voters deserve and desire to hear a third voice in the battle for the Second Suffolk.
September 30, 2008
It may be inevitable that the working public (hereafter referred to as Main Street) ante
up to rescue our botched national economy — though it’s difficult to believe that our money is the only real money available.
But who could possibly be surprised that your average citizens, who feed so far down on
the fiscal food chain that they've never even seen a menu, are suspicious of the bail-out
schemes being debated in Washington.
What is the financial community (a/k/a Wall Street) really asking?
Try: “Okay, now give us more of your money so we can loan it back to you at interest.”
That’s not exactly a win-win deal for the average Joan.
Seems to us that popular opposition to that plan bespeaks a rare vision of clarity for the
American public. Bilking invisible victims third or fourth hand is one thing; cheating
yourself one on one is another. This may be especially obvious to people on low-five-digit
fixed incomes who hear tales of financial execs getting eight-figure bonuses for
effectively breaking the bank at the Wall Street casino.
It’s a well known fact (on the shadier blocks of Main Street anyway) that if the house can’t cover it’s losses,
it’s ripe for take-over by organized crime. But that happened years ago in the gambling dens of the nation’s financial districts. So the only option for the white-collar mob is extortion. And we Main Street residents are the hapless pigeons.
As we said, a bailout may be unavoidable, but don’t try to tell us it’s fair. Evebody bend over and save yourselves.
September 30, 2008
In my recent Phoenix article, “Blunt Object,”
regarding Commonwealth marijuana reform, I guessed that Attorney General Martha
Coakley would decline to scold the Massachusetts District Attorneys Association
(MDAA) for allegedly publishing lies on its web site about the Committee for
Sensible Marijuana Policy (CSMP) and its Question 2 ballot initiative. I
predicted this for two reasons: 1 – While I believe that the district attorneys
who are lined up against marijuana decriminalization have absolutely bent the
truth, I assumed that they were smart enough to avoid legally slandering their
opponents; and 2 – Coakley is aligned with the district attorneys both
professionally and on this issue in particular, and no self-respecting attorney
general chooses ethical integrity over political camaraderie.
Let’s have a
quick recap of the CSMP complaints, one by one, with summaries of the positions
that Attorney General Coakley’s office took on them:
1 – The CSMP
claims the following MDAA statement to be false: “The proposed petition
decriminalizes the possession of up to an ounce of marijuana; consequently, any
person may carry and use marijuana at any time, thus ‘normalizing’ its use.” It
seems the MDAA covered its ass by throwing quotes around “normalize,” because
Coakley’s Deputy Chief Peter Sacks, who wrote the response, alleges that the
definition of “normalize” is thus a matter of opinion rather than a provable
falsehood. Furthermore, since the proposal only authorizes (but does not
require) municipalities to “explicitly forbid public use” of marijuana, it’s
cool for the MDAA to scare people into thinking that if Question 2 passes
everyone from bus drivers to grade school teachers will be habitually burning
spliffs.
2 – The CSMP
claims the following MDAA statement to be false: “Decriminalization will
reverse a recently documented positive trend in youth marijuana use.” I’m siding
with Coakley on this one; not only does the CSMP lack adequate evidence to
counter this allegation, but I’m fairly certain that kids will have easier (or
at least the same) access to weed if this measure passes. However, I do differ
from the district attorneys in that I don’t necessarily think that’s a bad
thing, particularly if young people will no longer be subjected to Criminal
Offender Record Information (CORI) reports that will eternally screw their
attempts at finding college loans, employment, and housing assistance.
3 – The CSMP
claims the following MDAA statement to be false: “There is a direct link
between marijuana use and criminal activity.” I suppose this is why I’d be a
shitty lawyer, but I don’t understand how, according to the attorney general’s
office (and the legal system, I suppose), “lack of evidence of truth does not
amount to proof of falsehood.” If the MDAA is so sure of this direct link, and
the district attorneys have access to a wealth of criminal statistics, then why
shouldn’t they have to (and better yet, why can’t they) provide resounding
evidence of this “direct link?”
4 – The CSMP
claims the following MDAA statement to be false: “There is a direct link
between marijuana use and motor vehicle crashes.” Marijuana reformers argued
that this statement is irrelevant because there is no evidence that the passage
of Question 2 would lead to increased marijuana use. Naturally, such self-sabotage
led Coakley’s office to reject this claim on grounds that Massachusetts campaign law “does not
prohibit the making of irrelevant statements in ballot question campaigns.”
5 – The CSMP
claims the following MDAA statement to be false: “There is a direct link
between marijuana use and workplace safety.” While I’m aware that the attorney
general is able to legally quash the first four allegations on quasi-legitimate
grounds, Coakley’s response to this particular grievance truly displays her
inability to objectively evaluate CSMP allegations. Rather than stating the old
“lack of evidence of truth does not amount to proof of falsehood,” Coakley’s
office simply decided that it prefers the MDAA evidence more than it does
studies offered by the CSMP. Furthermore, while the attorney general goes to
great lengths in referencing the MDAA Web site to defend the district attorneys,
marijuana reformers are strictly held to evidence cited in the CSMP complaint.
In conclusion, I
recommend that the CSMP stop attempting to fight establishment bullies on their
own turf. There’s no winning, especially when the honcho making decisions is admittedly
on the other side (and refuses to acknowledge a conflict of interest). Marijuana
smokers, reformers, and advocates should simply spread the message about what
Question 2 would actually do if passed. Those
who aren’t capable of understanding the reality of the situation are either Massachusetts district
attorneys, law enforcement officials who were conned into opposing this
measure, or close-minded opponents of the truth who are voting no on Question 2
anyway.
September 29, 2008
First of all, shana tova.
Now that we're done with formalities...