First she tried to market the image of herself as a fearless first-lady-caught-in the-line-of fire with her exaggerated claims of narrowly missing sniper fire while on a visit to Bosnia in 1996, but now she’s trying to dupe the public into thinking she possesses the same die-hard, give-it-your-all, not-going-down-without-a-fight personality as…Rocky Balboa? In her most recent public appearance, Senator Clinton compared herself to the legendary Sylvester Stallone character in a speech given to the AFL-CIO in Philadelphia today. "When it comes to finishing the fight, Rocky and I have a lot in common. I never quit. I never give up.  And neither do the American people.” Couldn’t she have picked a better person to compare herself to? Did she wake up and say, “Screw every other politician who gets compared to JFK and FDR. I’m going to compare myself to Rocky Balboa!” I wonder if she knows that Stallone is currently backing McCain. 

― Stacey Gallotta

By now, everybody knows that reform-minded/law-and-order-spouting New York governor Eliot Spitzer has been implicated in a major call-girl ring bust. (Pun-lovers, don't go there.)

This is sad for his voters, supporters, and family, of course, but given things that are really wrong in the world, we'd rank this particular non-event substantially below, say, African genocide and (only because Spitzer is an elected official) a half-step above Britney's shopping list.

Reaction from the high-end press (never mind that the New York Times broke the story) has been restrained. The mouths watered at the tabloids, on the other hand, and we got headlines like "PAY FOR LUV GUV" from the Daily News,  and the minimalist "HO NO!" from the New York Post. Thanks to the Internet, anybody can play the tasteless headline game. You can take your turn at the Write Your Own Post Headline blog. (Ignore the morons who didn't get the gag and merely contributed stupid comments.)

On the official side of things, there seem to be two slightly divergent state-run New York governor sites. The one linked from the current New York State site (click "Governor Spitzer," under "Executive") takes you to a place where the "Governor's Photo Gallery" features a string of inconsequential podium shots, which no doubt flattered certain constituents when they were posted.

But there's a parallel "Governor's Photo Gallery," reachable via a presumably decommissioned official Spitzer bio page. This one features lots of happy Spitzer family pictures — including a few very sad ones of the grinning gubernatorial cad posing with his teenage daughters. There's a good chance these are not the photos that the state of New York wants to show up under the next Luv Guv headline. Thank you for the irony, Google.

The blog people are out in full force, of course, with the predictable wide range of opinion — from the dismissive "Dog Bites Man Story" to an especially repulsive one titled "Burn in Hell, Eliot Spitzer."

But the prize (so far) goes to the Slice site — a forum apparently devoted to pizza. Here we learn that the wayward state executive doomed himself to ignominy by once endorsing an upstate pizza chain over genuine New York–style pies.

We think we have this one covered from every possible angle.

THE ROMNEY DIET
5 years ago
March 7, 2003 | Kristen Lombardi delved into Governor Romney’s fiscal budget to see who would be hurt most by his balancing act.
“Even before advocates can sort through Romney’s plan and decipher where, exactly, human-services spending has been cut, they’ve noted that, for all the talk of his ‘commitment’ to core services, the governor still manages to balance his FY ’04 budget on the backs of the state’s neediest citizens. For one thing, the governor’s proposal, known as ‘House 1,’ continues what advocates call the ‘reprehensible’ assault on small state agencies providing social services. It hammers away at the Disabled Persons Protection Commission, which investigates abuse in group homes...It slashes away $800,000 from vocational and home-care programs for residents grappling with brain injuries and other chronic disabilities...As MHLAC senior attorney Susan Fendell points out, ‘This is a terribly vulnerable population with great need for someone to go to bat for them and enforce their legal rights to mental-health care.’ ” Read Full Article

END OF AN ERA
10 years ago
March 6, 1998 | Jason Gay discussed the pacification of Cambridge, once Boston’s “Moscow-on-the-Charles.”
“...Cambridge’s progressive fireworks — it’s ‘People’s Republic’ rebelliousness — seem to be going the way of all those mom-and-pop stores on Mass Ave. The new Cambridge is rich and getting richer, less diverse, and (egad) more conservative. Likewise, the new Cantabrigian isn’t the activist type, and is less likely to pay attention to street-level city politics. Sure, people still care about issues like good schools, safe streets, and clean water, but when it comes to political life, Cambridge today has more in common with sleepier, more suburban-style cities like Brookline or Newton than with the Cambridge of old. There are different faces, different attitudes, and shifting priorities.” Read Full Article

FACING RACE
20 years ago
March 4, 1988 | Scott Lehigh observed how presidential candidate Jesse Jackson handled the race issue during a campaign stopover in Hazard, Kentucky.
“There is, of course, the asterisk that clings to Jackson like a shadow, an asterisk that says, in barely discernible subtext beneath the polite print, ‘Of course, though this man is one of the leaders in the polls right now, he can’t win because he is black.’ When a TV reporter asks him if he can win, Jackson is brusque. ‘Let’s concentrate on real substance, which is not race, but economic violence,’ he says. And in yet another Democratic debate in Williamstown, Virginia, he gets the biggest hand of the day with his dignified objection to the question of whether the other candidates let him off easy because he is black. But Jackson is too cagey a politician not to realize this is an issue he must address, and in Hazard he makes a not so subtle point: ‘When GE clears out, when they take away your job, when they take away your farm, they turn the lights out.’ A dramatic pause. ‘And all of us look just alike in the dark.’ ” Read Full Article

SHAME ON THE TRAIN 
25  years ago
March 8, 1983 | The Phoenix reported on a local pro-choice organization that battled the MBTA for the right to advertise on subway trains.
“Hemorrhoids, maybe. Dentures, no problem. But when ad requests for the MBTA trains and buses get ‘patently offensive,’ to quote T spokesman Paul DiNatale, they get rejected...

“The proposed advertising campaign, similar to the one run recently in Philadelphia, points out that, though women from every walk of life have had abortions, the right to abortion could be in jeopardy. According to Marjorie Heins, staff counsel for CLUM, the MBTA management was unhappy with the proposed ads because they didn’t want any advertising featuring the word ‘abortion.’...CLUM pointedly reminded T officials that the two had covered this ground in 1974, when the T refused an advertisement for Preterm, a clinic offering vasectomies, gynecological services, birth-control counseling, and abortions. Preterm promptly went to court...After Preterm won a preliminary injunction, the T backed down and posted the ads. When CLUM recalled that precedent, T officials reconsidered and accepted the latest abortion ads.”

On the off chance you're one of the three people who hasn't seen the original, the above will be much funnier after you watch this.

One thing we're gonna miss about the Hollywood writers' strike: dudes are gonna have less time on their hands for stuff like this. We only wish Mitt had dropped out a week later, if only so we coulda heard Fred Armisen warble "I saw my dad march with MLK." 

Dance in the streets!! Toast your neighbor!! Use exclamation marks with reckless abandon!! Seven years of ire and whining directed at Karl Rove finally paid off today as Bush's top political aide--the man credited as the brain behind every Republican victory in the past seven years (and blamed for the notable rout in the 2006 mid-term election)--announced his resignation at the end of the month. A favorite target of bloggers and liberal media outlets, "The Phoenix" contributed its share of anti-Rove sentiments over the years with dozens of articles paying tribute to the ruthless mind of the "Boy Genius" and "The Architect" as Bush has ordained him. In March, "The Phoenix" indicted Rove for choreographing the firing of eight U.S. attorneys for seemingly partisan reasons in "Rove's Footprints." And "Phoenix" political writer Adam Reilly expressed grudging admiration (the sort only expressed toward evil nemesis) of Rove here.

As for the impetus behind Rove's resignation, he told The Wall Street Journal that he wanted to spend more time with his family: "As much as I'd like to be here [the White House], I've got to do this for the sake of my family." He claimed that he has contemplated leaving for over a year and this decision is completely unrelated to the attorney firing scandal currently embroiling him. "I'm not going to stay or leave based on whether it pleases the mob," he added.

Rove's denial of the scandal's impact in his decision is more than a little questionable. As the pressure continues to mount against the previously invincible Wormtongue character, he likely opted to step down under his own terms rather than risk a less dignified removal. I expect the investigation will continue, but only half-heartedly, since Rove ousted himself and will still enjoy a degree of executive privilege protection from Bush and the White House.

Rove's optimism and ability to deny the elephant in the room even while it was standing on his feet was remarkable over the past seven years. In "The Wall Street Journal" interview, he declared that conditions in Iraq would improve, predicted Bush's approval ratings would recover and remained confident that Republicans will retain the White House in 2008. He also launched a parting shot at Hillary Clinton, whom he expects to win the Democratic primary, describing her as "a tough, tenacious, fatally flawed candidate."

For wielding influential clout as an advisor, Rove stands unmatched in American history, and his departure leaves a gaping hole unlikely to be filled in the next 15 months. Where will political bloggers aim our smarmy comments now? He will be missed, if only because of the tiresomeness of Cheney jokes and the difficulty in excerpting material from Bush that elicits more than a shake of the head and an imploring look at the calendar.

But before waxing sentimental about the "Rove Years," watch this video of Karl dancing and rapping as "MC Rove" at the Radio-Television Correspondents' Association Dinner. Then remember why we we're thrilled that he's back in Texas where his damage will be limited to the shrewd strategy guide he bequeathes to the GOP and to the book he plans to write about his years in the White House with "the Boss."
--David Mashburn

   If you’ve ever stayed home on Election Day disgusted with your choices, then this new proposal is for you. Or if you’ve ever idled in the voting booth wanting to scribble drawings of the male reproductive system all over the ballot, then the measure under consideration on Beacon Hill is definitely for you.

Massachusetts voters repulsed by the limited selection on Election Day may have an option other than smacking the voting machine: "None of the Above." A proposal put forth in the State House last week by Senator Robert A. O'Leary and Representative Cleon H. Turner would allow voters to opt for "None of the Above; For a New Election" on local and state races, though not federal races. If "NOTA" garners the most votes, another election would be held in 60 to 80 days with different candidates. Turner called the proposal a "novel idea" but lamented that it has "gained little traction on Beacon Hill."

If by "novel idea" Turner meant that the proposal is new or original, he'd be wrong. If he meant that it's the first time that political parties or institutions debated passing a "NOTA" binding resolution on ballots, well, he'd still be wrong.

In Spain, France and Ukraine it is standard procedure to list "NOTA" (or a close variant) on all ballots. Nevada also offers a non-binding "NOTA" option on all ballots, but because of its non-binding status, the candidate with the most votes still assumes office. The Green Party and the Libertarian Party both include "NOTA" on their ballots and Nader consistently runs as a “NOTA” candidate. If “NOTA” wins the majority of the votes in Libertarian or Green party elections, new elections are held.

The Committee Against Mediocrity in Politics (CAMP) has argued for adding a 28th amendment to the Constitution that would mandate the inclusion of a “NOTA” option for all elections: "In order to combat the mediocrity which seems to reign in our political candidates, CAMP is calling for Amendment XXVIII to the United States Constitution. This Amendment would add "None of the Above" to all federal election ballots, allowing voters to choose not to vote for a ballot of mediocre candidates."

In 2005, David Gatchell legally changed his middle name from "Leroy" to "None of the Above." David ‘None of the Above’ Gatchell ran unsuccessfully for governor of Tennessee in 2000 and for the U.S. Senate in 2006; his dog, Pugsly, managed his campaign. Unfortunately, state election commissioners unanimously banned his middle name from appearing on the ballot, claiming it would "cause confusion among voters." Pugsly and David disagreed but lost the appeal when the court decided his middle name was “issue-oriented.”

The “NOTA” legislation isn't exactly a fool-proof solution. It raises the thorny issue of whether or not to allow candidates to run again in the subsequent election. And it threatens to lengthen an already exhausting election season. Yet “NOTA” does present voters a new manner of registering their disgust with the candidates, one that can be tallied and can’t be ignored. Over time politicians may learn to avoid personal attacks and scandal mongering as they realize that they are not just vying to be crowned "the lesser of two evils." Maybe politicians will finally be held accountable to the people. And maybe our two-party system will finally receive the jolt it needs and jar voters out of their disillusionment! Or maybe “NOTA” will receive 0.2 percent of the total vote like ‘None of the Above’ Gatchell in 2006.

Even if the above is purely wishful thinking, at least voters won’t face the same dilemma as Marge and Homer in The Simpson’s Treehouse of Horror episode where Kang and Kodos impersonate Bob Dole and Bill Clinton in the 1996 election. When Homer reveals the candidates as evil aliens bent on ruling the Earth, Kodos laughs and declares, “What are you going to do, throw your vote away on a third-party candidate?” Not anymore, Kodos. Not if this “novel idea” gains a little more traction on Beacon Hill. Soon we’ll get the last laugh as we throw our vote away on “NOTA.”

Homer to Marge after Kang wins the presidency and enslaves the Earth: Don't blame me. I voted for Kodos!

--David Mashburn