THEY’RE STRETCHY PANTS, DUH
5 Years Ago
June 13, 2003 | Peter Keough wondered why Bruce Banner’s pants stay on when he undergoes transformation into the Hulk.
“To his credit, director Ang Lee broaches this question on his own. ‘People always ask, including myself, how come the pants always stay on? I wanted my Hulk to be naked. When he fights the dogs [these are mutant Hulk dogs, sicced on his girlfriend Betty (Jennifer Connelly) by his father (Nick Nolte)], he gets the pants torn off. He should be naked, we should see . . .’

“His, uh, Hulkness? Right. But we don’t. It’s dark. There are tree limbs. There are mutant dogs the size of taxi cabs. But no Little Hulk. After that, Lee gave up about the pants. ‘It’s too much trouble, trying to hide him. It got to the point that I felt like I was making Austin Powers.’ As Josh Lucas — who plays Talbot, Bruce Banner’s rival — puts it, ‘The Hulk’s pants stay on because they want a PG-13 rating.’

“Still, the questions persist. What material are those pants made of? Are they a metaphor for our own repression of the rage the Hulk embodies for us? Are they a dark hint of Oedipal castration?” Read Full Article

LOVE BITES
10 Years Ago
June 12, 1998 | Ellen Barry reported the details you didn’t want to know about mosquitoes’ sex lives.
“Mosquitoes are addled by sex, driven past all reason. Male mosquitoes will copulate for hours after their heads have been removed. If they weren’t born with their genitalia sticking out of their backs, they’d begin having sex the moment they hatched. But their abdomens begin rotating soon after they are born, and by the age of one day, they’re postpubescent and ready to cruise.

“This is important because whether or not you want to admit it, you, Reader, will be a party to the mosquito sex act many thousands of times during your life.”

UNFUCKWITHABLE
20 Years Ago
June 10, 1988 | Ric Kahn recalled how New Hampshire bounty hunter Lance Wilkinson had nabbed a criminal.
“Lance Wilkinson...was fresh on the trail of Ronnie Baby, a reputed thief and certified bail skipper who was on the lam in Lowell...First thing he did was reach for the phone. With his trigger finger he punched in the number on Ronnie Baby’s bail application. It was RB’s grandmother...

‘How do you do, I’m Reverend Alan,’ he lied to granny. ‘How is Ronnie doing?’
‘Oh, fine, Reverend,’ granny said.
‘I know Ronnie from jail. I like to check on my boys once in a while. I’m passing through Lowell and thought I’d say hi.’
‘Ronnie’s doing well, he’s working,’ granny said.
‘Oh, where is he living...?’
“Granny gave up the address...

“Wilkinson drove over to the address, knocked on the door. RB’s girlfriend answered. Wilkinson saw Ronnie Baby sitting there in the kitchen...

“As Wilkinson reached for his handcuffs, the bugger ran out the kitchen door and up a side street... Wilkinson flung his Willie Wacker, a club shaped like a beaver tail. Old Willie buzzed right by RB’s head, convincing the young man that now was a good time to stop running. With Wilkinson moving in on the arrest, Ronnie Baby responded with the desperate act of a hard-ass fugitive. He started to cry. ‘Don’t kill me. Don’t kill me. Don’t kill me.’ Once again, Wilkinson had gotten his man. Later, at the jailhouse, they had to hose that rascal RB down. Poor Ronnie Baby had shit his pants.”

PARTING SHOT
35 Years Ago
June 12, 1973 | Gill Gane quoted the always fun Yoko Ono at the National Organization for Women’s (NOW) International Feminist Planning Conference in Cambridge.
"It was Yoko who seemed to have the best last words:

“ ‘I started off thinking NOW,’ she announced, ‘but I ended up thinking WOW. All women are stateless — I see you have me down on the delegate list as being from England, I suppose that's because my husband is from there; well, I don't represent England, and I don't represent Japan either — all women are stateless, but we're getting together to form a new nation.’
 
“She suggested that in this new nation the policy towards men should be that undesirable aliens would of course be excluded, while desirable aliens could be admitted, but would have no vote.” ...

“ ‘I don’t like the the word ‘equality,’ ’ she declared, ‘I think it’s degrading. Men have had power for the past 2000 years; women should take it for the next 2000.’ ”

6/12/2008 12:10:00 PM by phloggist | Comments [0] |  

THEY’RE STRETCHY PANTS, DUH
5 Years Ago
June 13, 2003 | Peter Keough wondered why Bruce Banner’s pants stay on when he undergoes transformation into the Hulk.
“To his credit, director Ang Lee broaches this question on his own. ‘People always ask, including myself, how come the pants always stay on? I wanted my Hulk to be naked. When he fights the dogs [these are mutant Hulk dogs, sicced on his girlfriend Betty (Jennifer Connelly) by his father (Nick Nolte)], he gets the pants torn off. He should be naked, we should see . . .’

“His, uh, Hulkness? Right. But we don’t. It’s dark. There are tree limbs. There are mutant dogs the size of taxi cabs. But no Little Hulk. After that, Lee gave up about the pants. ‘It’s too much trouble, trying to hide him. It got to the point that I felt like I was making Austin Powers.’ As Josh Lucas — who plays Talbot, Bruce Banner’s rival — puts it, ‘The Hulk’s pants stay on because they want a PG-13 rating.’

“Still, the questions persist. What material are those pants made of? Are they a metaphor for our own repression of the rage the Hulk embodies for us? Are they a dark hint of Oedipal castration?” Read Full Article

LOVE BITES
10 Years Ago
June 12, 1998 | Ellen Barry reported the details you didn’t want to know about mosquitoes’ sex lives.
“Mosquitoes are addled by sex, driven past all reason. Male mosquitoes will copulate for hours after their heads have been removed. If they weren’t born with their genitalia sticking out of their backs, they’d begin having sex the moment they hatched. But their abdomens begin rotating soon after they are born, and by the age of one day, they’re postpubescent and ready to cruise.

“This is important because whether or not you want to admit it, you, Reader, will be a party to the mosquito sex act many thousands of times during your life.”

UNFUCKWITHABLE
20 Years Ago
June 10, 1988 | Ric Kahn recalled how New Hampshire bounty hunter Lance Wilkinson had caught a criminal.
“Lance Wilkinson...was fresh on the trail of Ronnie Baby, a reputed thief and certified bail skipper who was on the lam in Lowell...First thing he did was reach for the phone. With his trigger finger he punched in the number on Ronnie Baby’s bail application. It was RB’s grandmother...

‘How do you do, I’m Reverend Alan,’ he lied to granny. ‘How is Ronnie doing?’
‘Oh, fine, Reverend,’ granny said.
‘I know Ronnie from jail. I like to check on my boys once in a while. I’m passing through Lowell and thought I’d say hi.’
‘Ronnie’s doing well, he’s working,’ granny said.
‘Oh, where is he living...?’
“Granny gave up the address...

“Wilkinson drove over to the address, knocked on the door. RB’s girlfriend answered. Wilkinson saw Ronnie Baby sitting there in the kitchen...

“As Wilkinson reached for his handcuffs, the bugger ran out the kitchen door and up a side street... Wilkinson flung his Willie Wacker, a club shaped like a beaver tail. Old Willie buzzed right by RB’s head, convincing the young man that now was a good time to stop running. With Wilkinson moving in on the arrest, Ronnie Baby responded with the desperate act of a hard-ass fugitive. He started to cry. ‘Don’t kill me. Don’t kill me. Don’t kill me.’ Once again, Wilkinson had gotten his man. Later, at the jailhouse, they had to hose that rascal RB down. Poor Ronnie Baby had shit his pants.”

PARTING SHOT
35 Years Ago
June 12, 1973 | Gill Gane quoted the always fun Yoko Ono at the National Organization for Women’s (NOW) International Feminist Planning Conference in Cambridge.
"It was Yoko who seemed to have the best last words:

“ ‘I started off thinking NOW,’ she announced, ‘but I ended up thinking WOW. All women are stateless — I see you have me down on the delegate list as being from England, I suppose that's because my husband is from there; well, I don't represent England, and I don't represent Japan either — all women are stateless, but we're getting together to form a new nation.’
 
“She suggested that in this new nation the policy towards men should be that undesirable aliens would of course be excluded, while desirable aliens could be admitted, but would have no vote.” ...

“ ‘I don’t like the the word ‘equality,’ ’ she declared, ‘I think it’s degrading. Men have had power for the past 2000 years; women should take it for the next 2000.’ ”

6/12/2008 12:10:00 PM by phloggist | Comments [0] |  

BOARD GAMES
5 years ago
May 30, 2003 | Chris Wright extolled the advantages of an online social life.
“The thing is, my online social life has everything I could wish for. There's tenderness: ‘My condolences to you and your family.’ There's ribbing: ‘Chris, you are one dumb mule.’ There's fighting: ‘Of course I was insulting you, dumbfuck.’ There's flirting: ‘I got all dolled up for ya ... red silky panties & matching bra.’ There are confessions: ‘I shit myself at work yesterday and had to throw my boxers in the garbage.’ And there's outright weirdness: ‘Yeah, I don't shave my balls either.’
“Best of all, we can do this free of consequences. There are no diseases to worry about, no bar tabs to divvy up, no questions about where we'll meet or who's invited. We can sit around in our undies, zits on our faces and our hair in tatters, and make like we just stepped off the runway at a Prada fashion show.” Read Full Article

SOMEONE’S EXCITED
20 years ago
May 27, 1988 | Francis J. Connolly was awed by the Celtics’ playoff win over the Atlanta Hawks.
“By now, the astonishment having passed into memory and the riot of superlatives having subsided in the face of the new challenge from Detroit, it’s possible to put Sunday’s Boston victory over the Atlanta Hawks into some sort of realistic perspective. What we’re talking about here, remember, was only a basketball game...That Bird and the Celtics managed, through the force of sheer will, to prevail against a younger, faster, and more muscular Atlanta squad should be of little consequence in this hard and cynical world; Colonel Qaddafi, it’s safe to guess, was not impressed by what happened in the Garden Sunday afternoon, nor did news of the Celtic triumph have any noticeable effect on Wall Street, in the shipyards of Gdansk, or at the Vatican. What happened Sunday, after all, was just a game.

“All of which is like saying that the Titanic was a fairly big boat, that Astaire could dance a little, that Pavarotti can carry a tune, or that Marlene Dietrich had a decent set of gams. Boston’s victory over the Hawks was one of those exercises in artistry that demands understatement, precisely because there is no adequate way to describe it. Either you saw it, and you know what true athletic greatness is, or you did not, and the loss is yours.”

LOSE THE MUPPETS, MAN
25 years ago
May 31, 1983 | Owen Gleiberman found Return of the Jedi to be an unsatisfying end to the Star Wars trilogy.
“...the commercialism of Jedi isn’t what’s so bothersome...The truth is that, in trying to stage the ultimate Muppet-movie, Lucas has shortchanged his vision. The final chapter of the Star Wars trilogy is the last part of the saga that should have been gummed up with cuteness. We want grandeur in the climactic episode — blaring trumpets, an epic plot, a final duel so rousing we watch it with our hearts in our throats. Return of the Jedi is fun, but it isn’t a satisfying rave-up. Whenever the movie verges on the requisite sense of majesty, it’s interrupted by cuddly half-pints dancing around a treehouse like so many Winnie the Poohs. Just when you want George Lucas to get grandiose, he turns into a puppet master.”

EXTREME MAKEOVER
30 years ago
May 30, 1978 | D.C. Denison looked at the second generation of skateboarding.
“It may be dangerous, but it’s clean. And the effect of this fresh image on the sport is not lost on Skateboarder publisher Dave Dash. ‘There is no sex and violence, no dirty posters or condom ads in our magazine,’ he assures. ‘Parents can trust it.’ And they can also trust the new circle of skateboard heroes, who are careful to maintain an all-American image... In the words of Bill Riordan, the agent who steered Jimmy Connors to fame and currently manages 18-year-old Ty Page, one of the hottest skateboarders in the country, ‘To make this sport viable in America, you need to create national heroes to sustain it. Ty’s image is apple pie and ice cream. He’s clean-cut, wears proper safety equipment, and everyone wants to mother him. Jimmy Connors came up in the age of the anti-hero. It was easy to make a rascal out of him. Those days are over. We’re in the Goldwater phase of teenagers now.’ ”

5/29/2008 2:49:00 PM by phloggist | Comments [0] |  

We might actually be able to get behind this. We don't remember the details of the show, but the episode list on Wikipedia indicates that those little guys were dealing with some heavy shit.

5/13/2008 4:08:00 PM by phloggist | Comments [0] |  

Happy Mental Detox week! Yeah, so Mental Detox week began on Monday and I have yet to actually turn anything off - or at least the things that AdBusters, who launched the original TV Turn-Off week (now renamed Mental Detox Week) back in 1994, want me to. AdBusters has changed the guidelines to be both more forgiving and more inclusive. Sign of the times: I actually (unintentionally) haven't turned on my TV at all this week, which means if it was still plain-old TV Turn-Off Week, I'd be all "Hey, no problem! I can go without TV easily," but the Internet?! Here's the thing, a job that requires staring at Snap Judgments and bus stop street art on the Internets all day + IFFB + newly downloaded episodes of My So-Called Life, which I can't believe I'm still obsessing over, via Miro + Does seeing live music count? Because I've already done that twice this week = Too Many Complications for Mental Detoxification. FAIL.

Here's what AdBusters wants me to do:

"Today you’re not going to listen to your iPod. You aren’t going to stare at a computer screen any more than you absolutely have to. Today you won’t worry about unanswered email, and you’re not going to login to Facebook. You’ll cut the time you spend on digital devices right down to the bone.

In the evening maybe you will watch your favorite TV show for an hour, but after that you switch off, have a conversation, wash the dishes, read for a bit, and just relax. You do that for five days, and then on Friday night you make a decision to unplug completely for the whole weekend.

For a couple of days you might feel like an addict in withdrawal: peevish, agitated, and distracted. But then something will happen. Your over-stimulated brain will cleanse itself. You’ll relax. You’ll feel calmer, more grounded."

The fact that all of this is posted on a website (and now I'm reposting it on a blog) is sort of cloaked in irony - how are we supposed to spread the word about Mental Detox Week and actually detox at the same time? Smoke signals? Snail-mail chain letters? Don't get me wrong, Mental Detox week would be great if I could take the week off and go camping at Yosemite, gather a group of friends and a cooler of cold beverages (but no road-tripping tunes, of course!!), but I can't. I guess this is just my way of saying "Hi, My name is Caitlin, and I'm addicted to glorious, musical, visually-stimulating technology, AKA mental toxins."

-- Caitlin E. Curran

4/24/2008 12:43:37 PM by Will Spitz | Comments [0] |  

We try not to post too many memes these days, but this one was pretty good. It's self-explanatory: scenes from Star Wars with Darth Vader's dialog replaced by Daniel Plainview's from There Will Be Blood.

3/25/2008 8:30:46 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

Last week, nine extras were injured on the set of the new Bryan Singer-directed movie, Valkyrie, starring Tom Cruise as the Nazi officer who attempted to assassinate Hitler. The extras received only slight injuries--minor bruises and scrapes--when a side panel broke off the truck, slinging them out. They have hired a lawyer and are threatening to sue United Artists for exhibiting "inhuman indifference" to their health unless "rapidly compensated."

Not to make light of the extras' injuries (one even had to stay at the hospital overnight for observation) but the real gem of this story is that we all have a reason to laugh at Tom Cruise, yet again. In late June, the German Defense Ministry barred Singer, Cruise and crew from shooting Valkyrie on military sites. Their reason was Cruise's adherence to Scientology. Defense Ministry spokesman Harald Kammerbauer stated that they "will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult." Kammerbauer went on to declare Scientology a "momeymaking cult" and decried it as an illegitimate church.

Sure nearly everyone dislikes Scientology, and no one really considers it a legitimate church but without Scientology we wouldn't have "Trapped in the Closet," possibly the funniest South Park episode ever. Furthermore, isn't the German government's intolerance of Scientology at least slightly akin to Hitler's anti-semitism? No? Yeah, I guess not. Come on Germany screw those Nazi-loving Scientologists.

--John Smith (David Mashburn)

8/22/2007 4:16:09 PM by Nina MacLaughlin | Comments [1] |  

8/13/2007 12:56:26 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

8/10/2007 10:37:06 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

8/9/2007 3:36:14 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

We were wary of posting this because we weren't sure how legit it was, but Entertainment Weekly seems to be running with it, so here goes nothing. The poster for Cloverfield/1-18-08:

7/26/2007 4:50:47 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

7/26/2007 9:26:50 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

Amidst all the Potter bru-ha-ha -- the parties, the movie, the final installment -- we came up with a list of 25 fantasy movies that surpass the Potter puff. Enjoy it here, and add your own suggestions, as well.

Potter-Schmotter: 25 fantasy films that lock horns, swords, and wands with Harry Potter

7/24/2007 1:38:38 PM by Nina MacLaughlin | Comments [0] |  

7/20/2007 10:29:15 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

Here's a clip from the forthcoming I'm Not There starring Cate Blanchett (among others) as Bob Dylan. Seen here interacting with David Cross as Allen Ginsberg:

7/16/2007 12:08:42 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

(On short notice, this was the closest thing to a Vermont-related Simpsons clip we could find. It involves syrup.)

We'd call it a mild upset considering the larger towns and states involved, but it's true: Springfield, Vermont will host the Simpsons Movie premiere on July 21st. Congrats to all involved with their campaign.

7/10/2007 5:46:54 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [1] |  

Those of you who have seen the Transformers movie may recall seeing this trailer: it's shot on digital video and seems to be focused on a going-away party for some guy named "Rob." Suddenly the lights go out and the ground starts to shake and everyone runs outside. As the crowd is trying to figure out what the hell is going on, the head of the Statue of Liberty comes flying into the frame. There's no indication of what exactly everyone's looking at, only that it is "alive" and "huge." The camera cuts out, and then a graphic identifies what we're watching as coming from producer J. J. Abrams. It also gives us a date, January 18, 2008.

As one might imagine, particularly when the co-creator of one of the most-analyzed cult TV hits ever is involved, the internet has been going nuts with speculation. A few things were figured out pretty quickly: the project (code name: "Cloverfield") is some kind of verite-style monster movie, and the "official" site is 1-18-08.com. The imdb has a brief cast list up; the biggest name is probably Lizzy Caplan (Janis from Mean Girls and Nick Andopolis's girlfriend on the last episode of Freaks and Geeks). Also, A spy report published various places spoke of something called "Slusho," which is another code name related to this project.

Here's where it gets interesting: there was a report that there were these two sites that were related to the bizarre viral marketing campaign, EthanHaaswaswrong.blogspot.com which was a blog (obviously) about this one dude and Ethanhaaswasright.com, which had these puzzles you could solve. Well, scratch that: J. J. Abrams e-mailed Harry Knowles to say that none of that stuff had anything to do with his project.

But, um... why exactly should we believe him?

7/10/2007 10:53:06 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

Two New England Springfields are among the 14 vying for the chance to host the premiere of The Simpsons Movie. The cities submitted videos, and voting will take place on USA Today's Web site as part of the July lead-up to the film's debut.

Massachusetts residents feel they have a legit claim on this, as series co-creator Mike Scully is from Springfield. But within the show, there aren't really too many similarities. Their video does include Ted Kennedy, though.

That notwithstanding, as much as we try to root for the home team in this, it seems like Springfield, Mass has an uphill climb. Springfield, Vermont at least has a nuclear plant. Springfield, Illinois is situated right near a Shelbyville. Springfield, Oregon - the probable inspiration for the fictional city, since Matt Groening is from Portland - has, among other things, a Jebediah Springfield-like statue in the middle of its town square.

Incidentally, there's also a new trailer for the film, one that paints a much clearer picture of the plot.

6/21/2007 5:14:40 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [5] |  

6/14/2007 4:20:52 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

In spite of what our film critic may say, some of us are honestly pretty excited about Knocked Up. And we're probably even more excited for Superbad, also from the mind of Judd Apatow, starring the brilliant Michael Cera (you may know him as George Michael from Arrested Development.)

Cera and Apatow filmed this clip from the set of Knocked Up, an apparent parody of the video footage of the blow-up between David O. Russell and Lily Tomlin that circulated around the internet a few months back.



Here's the original, in case you missed it. It's from the set of Russell's 2004 film I Heart Huckabees

5/31/2007 3:23:36 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [3] |  

Variety reports that Fox has optioned the rights to a movie based on...

(wait for it...)

THE SIMS

No, really. Someone thinks that this will make a good movie.

5/25/2007 4:16:17 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [1] |  

First, I see this poster for Macbeth re-imagined as like a zombie movie or something:

5/24/2007 3:55:41 PM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

LISTEN: Michael Moore at Cannes (mp3)

My day 2 of the Cannes Film Festival was all about notorious Michael Moore and the somewhat lighter project documentary on health care in the United States, Sicko. It was at the Cannes Film Festival back in 2004 that publicized Moore’s much-heralded signature documentary, Fahrenheit 9/11, designed to influence the public’s opinion of presiding President Bush for the 2004 Presidential Election. Moore is the sexiest thing in Cannes, and has been ever since he became America’s No.1 Bush hater; every pound of him. Not to mention his red-carpet appearances sparking well-received applause from side-walk onlookers, Moore’s press conferences had the reporters elated with drool as well.

Yesterday, I got to sit in on one of the press conferences with Michael up front on stage being interviewed by respected Variety editor Peter Bart—who were both introduced by Santa Barbara Film Festival manager Roger Durling as “the two most dangerous men in Hollywood.” It must be so, because both were breaking open the professional shells of each reporter; inducing them to get out of their seats and cheer Moore on like in a political rally. Even though the conference was designated for Sicko, the conference became a political agenda speech; not just speaking on his behalf as the voice of the mainstream liberal party, but revving up criticism against the Bush Administration and public as he does at American colleges on tour. The interview was a full recap of what Sicko tried to convey about America’s putrid health care and criminal private health insurance firms, and how it all compares to Canada, France, and Sweden. Funny enough, Moore admitted at the conference that he researched Norway as well, but thought it was way too weird how good the health care is over there. “Norway is so crazy good, and so ridiculous, more ridiculous than France, they send you for a week to the Canary Islands at a spa. We got so [freaked] out by that, we just couldn’t put it in.” I don’t if this statement is valid, but the point is clear about how America’s domestic service compares to the rest of the world.

                                           

(Michael Moore, director of Sicko)

 

The most notable point of the conference was on Moore’s future in his role right now as mainstream’s most popular documentary director—documentaries being low on the totem pole for “coolness,” but Moore has revitalized public interest. It was apparent Moore was tired of taking all the punches when his supporters and fans stand aside speechless. “I’m like the one voice marching up against all of the lies perpetrated upon the American public—in this case, for health care. At some point, I hope I can catch a break here, because how much longer do I have to be doing this? I take the shit for it. I’m a human being too because I have to live through all this. I don’t enjoy it,” Moore explained. It was quite an endearing scene watching Moore show us his scars; for once Moore seemed more human than a political-filmmaking activist. After explaining the backlash he’s received from his work, the sea of reporters gave him a sympathetic applause. It was clear Moore was in a room of friends. Moore was asked later by one of the reporters how much longer he expects to distribute his work political documentaries, and Moore responded: “I kid around to the crew that I’m going to make just two more movies, and then maybe I’ll do something with the ice-capades or something, I don’t know, [crowd laughter]. I can’t not do what I’m doing, just like everyone else in this room,” Moore said. Everyone in the crowd silently screamed: “THANK GOD!” The buzz around the festival with the critics was that many hard-nosed reporters literally cried during the screening here--talk about fan support.

5/22/2007 3:46:21 AM by Jett Wells | Comments [0] |  

If you don't want to know what he looks like yet, then don't say we didn't warn you.

5/21/2007 9:43:01 AM by Ryan Stewart | Comments [0] |  

Jetlag can feel like a hangover sometimes, but once I finally landed in Cannes of Southern France, 6 hours ahead, I must’ve consumed a whole bottle of Absinthe intravenously. Peering out of my tiny window in my tiny plane barely gliding over a deep and massive Mediterranean Sea, Cannes, France appeared in the distance like Honolulu with the excessive commercial development. Fleets of gloating yachts owned by corporate sponsors squatted in front of the beached pavilion tents like fat kings. Peering into this dubious oasis didn’t endorse my cynical impressions of Hollywood imperialism; it gave new light to the worldwide fandom of film and also how insane it is to be a reporter in this place.

The 60^th Cannes Film Festival kicked off last week and has been generating publicity globally ever since. Several movies like Michael Moore’s Sicko and the Coen Brothers’ (Joel and Ethan) No Country for Old Men have been creating the biggest buzz to be the strongest indie contenders to be released. Since the Festival is crossing into a new decade, the guns had to be blazing with higher security, more expensive tickets, and big pyrotechnics in the evenings. Each country has its own tent for their associated journalists, including the U.S., to which the egoist title: The American Pavilion. Can’t you hear James Earl Jones roaring that for ambiance? Given it’s aging tenure, the Cannes Film Festival is now as big a cultural icon as the Oscars, and everyone covers it—even CNN, covering Jerry Seinfeld’s promotion event for Bee Movie with Jerry in his ridiculous bee outfit, swooping in like Howard Stern as Fart-Man. Every night is red-carpet night during this pop-culture brothel, which means the tourists and locals flock like sheep to stakeout good viewpoints from sidewalks during the day to hopefully later drool over celebrities driving by. Oddly enough, the celebrities seem to embrace the city and gawking fans because their European cars driving them to the Palais center for the big evening screening have transparent windows. There’s no window tinting in France, baby!

                                                

                                                               (Jerry Seinfeld, Bee Movie)

 

After dropping the luggage and absorbing the overwhelming ambiance of Cannes like a Television monitor, I recollected consciousness by sitting-in on a press conference for No Country for Old Men. Supporting Actors Josh Brolin and Javier Bardem with their writers and directors Ethan and Joel Coen represented the film at the conference. No Tommy Lee Jones unfortunately. To summarize first, No Country for Old Men is an adaptation of Cormac McCarthy’s novel which includes an investigation on a finding of dead bodies along with heroin and money, and it is said that the movie itself plays a sensitive theme with the immigration reform going on today in politics. So along the beach with the endless mirage of tents and tourists, the conference took place in a very Andy Warhol-eque restaurant. I only say this because it was obvious the stylist was trying a little hard by hanging paper boulders along with glass spheres from the ceiling; so in turn, the restaurant is perfectly consistent in the vanity of the city.

I landed at a table where six other journalists in their mid-30s were already questioning Josh Brolin. Brolin, a relatively small-time actor on the rise was wearing shades (typical) with dark long hair, hunched over the table as he heralded the movie and played politics. However, the most interesting part of his interview was how he got the role for “Moss.” Apparently, when the film was still casting and Josh Brolin was finishing up his work with Quentin Tarantino in Death Proof, Tarantino helped Brolin rehearse his lines and taped a sound-set scene with Brolin just reading from the script. The Coen brothers received the tape and the deal was set. Even though Brolin spoke of himself in a very modest fashion, he’s clearly building up his confidence by inheriting principles on selecting movies—not doing it just for the money. “I’m tired of doing movies I don’t respect,” Brolin said. This is kind of uplifting since this is coming from a guy who has a history with Blockbuster junk like “Mimic” and “Hollow Man.” Brolin is a very endearing character because of how hard he works, how much he makes his work contribute to family, but also how humble he is. But then again, maybe I’m just buying too much into political language. The quote of the conversation was: “I will make more money on the stock market than I will with acting.”

The Coen Brothers followed Brolin, and it was curious how much I let my imagination depict these guys as Greek Gods because my admiration for some of their work, like The Big Lebowski and Fargo. They sat down looking skinny, and well, geeky, but also ying-yang. Ethan, the more prominent voice of the two, had short hair, and spoke with a very soft voice. In fact because both the brothers had little vocal presence and the chatter of the restaurant was rather dominating, I could hear practically nothing from across the table. Even though I got little out of the dialogue between the other journalists and the Coen brothers, I noticed another superficial anomaly; Joel, co-writer of The Big Lewbowski, had much more raggedy look and spoke very little behind his protective shades, and as he played around with his raw fish—he immediately reminded me of the character he created: The Dude.

Last but certainly not least was Javier Bardem who played “Chigurh” First thing that came to mind when I saw him was that he was someone else—Jeffrey Dean Morgan from Grey’s Anatomy, A.K.A “Denny”. I dumped my hypothesis when I heard Bardem’s Spanish accent. Bardem, for the most part, was probably the most casual and charismatic character at the entire conference. I enjoyed how he was the first to pull out a cigarette and bum a lighter from one of the reporters at my table. As for what he said, I was slightly unenthusiastic about since he used spiritual terms to describe his acting, like for example (not actual quote) “it came from within me.” Aside from the crack-pot hyperboles, Bardem gave full answers and seemed pretty interested in the interview. The quote of this conversation was a comment about the whole movie project from a racial standpoint: “I felt weird about being only foreigner in American movie with American staff in Texas.”

Being a reporter at the Cannes Film Festival isn’t a vacation, and in fact, most of the time you see reporters, they’re either logging away at their laptops in their tents or running to and from screenings and press conferences. Only at the end of the day, can the average Cannes reporter relax by scavenging on finger-food and downing free drinks at parties all around the city. It can seem like mayhem at times, grinding publicists for extra access and scheduling the events. Because of the class-dividing of reporter access based on the color of your press pass, hostility between lower access and higher access reporters brews at times. After eaves-dropping on the journalists at the conference table from the No Country for Old Men junket, a late-comer journalist from Variety squeezed in at our table to listen in on the Coen Brothers. Afterwards, when the Coen Brothers moved on, the Variety reporter decided to comment by saying: “I don’t usually come to these things.” The reporter left and the rest of the journalists gossiped about the condescending tone of the comment only after they noticed he had high-access color on his press pass. All in a day’s work as a teenage reporter peering into static industry of film.

5/21/2007 5:51:46 AM by Jett Wells | Comments [0] |