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Best of Portland 2009

NBA Southwest Division

Latest Articles

Crossword: ''That's B. S.''

At least it's broken up
At least it's broken up
By MATT JONES  |  May 29, 2009
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Love hurts

Tough times for Dirk Nowitzki. Plus, a Pitt Panther gets caught shooting blanks.
There've been some bizarre stories over the years involving gullible jocks and their inappropriate, multiple-alias-bearing girlfriends/wives.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  May 20, 2009

95. Marko Jaric

MODEL F#%KER
Maybe Victoria’s Secret bombshells have a thing for goofy Serb point guards with eyes that are way closer to each other than they oughta be — but we don’t. With stats like Marko’s, this droopy-visaged Memphis Grizzlies scrub needs a lot more than Adriana Lima on his arm to escape the wrath of Unsexiness..
By Boston Phoenix Staff  |  March 25, 2009
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Celtic crossed

If a certifiable crazy man is signed to your position, here is what you don't do: act weirder than him
It was nice knowing ya, Gabe Pruitt.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  March 04, 2009

Crossword: ''Hit the bricks''

A classic case of one-upmanship
A classic case of one-upmanship
By MATT JONES  |  August 20, 2008

Bought and paid for

Balls and pucks
Boston haters will say that the Celtics purchased their 17th championship.
By RICK WORMWOOD  |  June 18, 2008
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Tweens of yore

Blogging the Baby-Sitters Club
At age eight, Kimberly Hutt sent a manuscript to Scholastic Corporation.
By CAITLIN E. CURRAN  |  April 23, 2008
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Semi-pro

A grand idea
This Will Ferrell send-up attempts to do for bush-league basketball what Bull Durham did for baseball and Slap Shot for hockey.
By TOM MEEK  |  February 27, 2008
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Skell of the year

Sports crime: 2007 in review
Much less funny than usual, was 2007.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  December 18, 2007
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Can't drive 55

Sports blotter: "Sammy Hagar" edition
This past week, we snared an early candidate for the next Justin Miller Award, given to the athlete who most bollockses up his professional-draft status with an avoidable pre-draft arrest.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  December 12, 2007
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Do mess with Texas

Sports blotter: "Houston has a problem" edition
The Houston Texans are like the soy cheese of the sporting world.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  December 05, 2007
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Bob's your uncle

Sports blotter: "Across the pond" edition
When was the last time England was relevant at all in the sporting world?
By MATT TAIBBI  |  November 28, 2007
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Bonds away

Sports blotter: "Barry's indictment" edition
This Barry Bonds thing is going to be a big story, no doubt, but trust me: even bigger news is probably coming.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  November 19, 2007
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Tennessee two-step

Sports blotter: "All offensive linemen" edition
Tough week for the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga, where two football players were busted within a span of three days.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  November 14, 2007
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Pure idiocy

Sports blotter: "Genius of the year" edition
We’ve had some real winners light up the crime blotter this year.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  November 07, 2007
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A leafy, green substance

Sports blotter: "Copious amounts of pot" edition
Just when you thought the “supernaturally large quantity of marijuana” sports bust was a thing of the past.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  October 31, 2007
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Off point

Sports blotter: "Celtics fans still hate this guy" edition
Lots of class being shown this year by New York–area point guards.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  October 24, 2007
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Surely you can't be serious

Sports blotter: "Don't call me Shirley!" edition
Early nomination for collegiate crime-dweeb of the year goes to Fresno State defensive lineman Jason Shirley.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  October 17, 2007
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Brown out

Sports blotter: "All people named 'Brown' " edition
A few years ago it would have seemed unlikely that former No. 1 overall pick Kwame Brown would leave any legacy at all, but that situation has clearly changed.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  October 10, 2007
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Willie returns

Sports blotter: "Never fade away" edition
Remember Willie Williams?
By MATT TAIBBI  |  October 03, 2007
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Free the Juice

Sports blotter: "Return of Orenthal James" edition
As you surely have heard by now, O.J. Simpson is up to his old tricks again.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  September 26, 2007
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Texas two-step

Sports blotter: "Horns hooked" edition
The Texas Longhorns have been a real gift to the sports-crime-reporting industry of late.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  September 19, 2007
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Rocket science

Sports blotter: "Houston hydroponics" edition
Tough, tough summer for the Houston Rockets, arrest-wise.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  September 14, 2007
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And one

Sports blotter: "NBA Street" edition
Let’s play a game — it’s called “Celebrity Take-the-Hint.”
By MATT TAIBBI  |  September 05, 2007
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Squish the fish

Sports blotter: "Dolphin crime" edition
Hey New England, can I get a “Sucks to be you, you got a DWI, you LOSER!”
By MATT TAIBBI  |  July 18, 2007
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America Blows

Since George W. Bush took office, the United States has sunk to unprecedented lows in sports and pop-culture domination
The United States of America is a nation with a proud history.
By MIKE MILIARD  |  June 29, 2007
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Touched by a taser

Sports blotter: "More Pittsburgh pimping" edition
Such was the fate of DerMarr Johnson, who just made himself the latest entry in what is becoming a shockingly long list.
By MATT TAIBBI  |  June 13, 2007
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Political Movement

And who will dig Diggers?
Jeff Silva and Alla Kovgan are the curators of the long-going Balagan Film Series at the Coolidge Corner, and also estimable cinéastes in their own right.
By GERALD PEARY  |  April 24, 2007
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Is the RIAA inoculating itself against viral video?

YouTube under fire
You’ve seen them: the hundreds upon hundreds of homemade clips on YouTube and Google Video where bored teenagers set up a webcam and lip-sync cheekily to their favorite songs.
By MIKE MILIARD  |  June 21, 2006

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