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The Phoenix Best 2012

Lifestyle Features

Is Santa a one-percenter? Sometimes it seems that way.

Look at the guy, sequestered up there in his palatial North Pole mansion — about as far away as one can be from the mouth-breathing hoi polloi. Dressed in his fur-trimmed finery, he lords it over a clattering sweatshop of toy-making wage slaves. Been naughty this year? Expect a big chunk of Koch Brothers–brand coal stuffed in your stocking.

Then again, who’s more generous than that eye-twinkling fellow? Who’s more solicitous of the wellbeing of the other 99 percent than the kindly old elf himself? Can even the most liberal and civic-minded among us imagine spending 364 days of the year preparing for one lighting-quick, globe-spanning, Seal Team 6–efficient nighttime raid of orgiastic altruism? Santa is the anti–Ayn Rand.

As he loads his sleigh with gadgets and gizmos — gifting Scrooges and Tiny Tims alike — Santa will be fulfilling the wish lists of those on both sides of the Occupy Wall Street divide. After all, everyone likes technology. Just that some people can afford the higher-end stuff.

FOR THE 1% DIAMOND ROSEIPHONE 4 ($8 MILLION) ANDIPAD 2: GOLD HISTORY EDITION | $8.1 MILLION | STUARTHUGHES.COM | Steve Jobs was lauded for his keen eye for sleek and intuitive design, his obsessive attention to the tiniest aesthetic detail. So one has to assume he'd be aghast to see his proudest inventions decked out in such ridiculous frippery. Created by Liverpool-based purveyor of "exclusive elite gadgets" Stuart Hughes, these vanity projects push the extravagance envelope. The iPhone 4 is framed in rose gold, with 500 diamonds. The "home" button is platinum, centered with a rose diamond. The iPad 2, meanwhile, takes things even further - much further. It's got gold and diamonds galore, sure. It's also bedecked with shards and shavings of 65-million-year-old Tyrannosaurus Rex thigh bone. As these things sometimes are.