Lifestyle Features

Photos: Halloween costumes not fit for public

From lame, totally un-pc, and just plain wrong, our list helps make sure you're not dressed like an asshole this Halloween

By LISA SPINELLI | October 28, 2009

Before you leave the house to head out to a party, you might decide to dress your pet up in something cute and adorable, but sexy? Something is inherently wrong about putting your dog in an outfit that screams sex like a harem or cute Catholic school girl outfit. Just say no.

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Meat hands, and other truly disgusting Halloween treats
Remember Halloween back in simpler times, when Mom would bake bat-shaped cookies and trick you and your friends into reaching into a bag full of spaghetti “worms”? Good times.
Be afraid
This Halloween, if you want to scare the crap out of your favorite political activist — liberal or conservative — skip the fright mask, fake blood, and glowing green goop.
Halloween Weekend Overdose
Halloween is in six days and you still have no idea what party you're going to. You simultaneously feel as though you have everything to do and nothing to do. You haven't even got a costume anymore, because your lazy stoner friend stole your zombie Billy Mays schtick .
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Meat hands, and other truly disgusting Halloween treats
Remember Halloween back in simpler times, when Mom would bake bat-shaped cookies and trick you and your friends into reaching into a bag full of spaghetti “worms”? Good times.
Be afraid
This Halloween, if you want to scare the crap out of your favorite political activist — liberal or conservative — skip the fright mask, fake blood, and glowing green goop.
Halloween Weekend Overdose
Halloween is in six days and you still have no idea what party you're going to. You simultaneously feel as though you have everything to do and nothing to do. You haven't even got a costume anymore, because your lazy stoner friend stole your zombie Billy Mays schtick .
Photos: Gross Thanksgiving food to avoid
Thanksgiving is a time for gorging on food and hanging out with family, but really it's mostly about the food. There are some dishes that take it too far, however, and we are here to help you steer clear of those.
Firehouse No. 13 shakes up summer slump
To wake the city from its summer slumber, Firehouse No. 13 has been programming, well, everything.
For the sullied and the bullied
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey: When he was younger, my brother was a very popular and attractive guy. He was lucky with the ladies and dated quite a wide variety of them. In the past few years, however, he seems to have fallen apart.
Irish ayes
Beer comes in a rainbow of different colors, but green is not one of them. Unless it's St. Patrick's Day, of course.
Jews just want to have fun
The streets are deserted, the storefronts chained shut, and there's not a glimmer of neon to guide you to your favorite bar.
What's love got to do with it
"Happy Valentine's Day. That was a saint, right? St. Valentine?" mumbled Lewis & Clarke's (wasted?) frontman/sonic adventurer, Lou Rogai.
Kissing off 2009
I had no New Year's kiss last year. I had fun, friends, a bonfire, and a bellyful of delicious food, but no kiss.
Seasonal sipping
If you’ve got special reason to drown or celebrate this fall, Portland’s mixologists offer several autumnal elixirs that take advantage of the flavors and clean-slate feeling of fall.
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Stay away from these costume choices this Halloween

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