Get Thee to the Geek: An abridged guide to ImprovBoston's Geek Week

Your mom might not get you, your co-workers might not get you (unless you work here at at the Phoenix), and it's a pretty safe bet most members of the opposite sex really don't get you but, hark, there are people out there who do. Or so ImprovBoston's Geek Week claims. That's right, it's that time of year again. The time when even the pastiest-faced of Level 60 Night Elves put their Alienwares to sleep, crawl out of their parents' basements, and step out into the light. Geek Week! We are psyched. The fourth edition of Geek Week promises five days (April 28-May 2) chock full of nerdgasmic improv sets, skits, and lectures.

Patrons of dorkdom that we are, we've already bookmarked a few events we deem not-to-be-missed. To wit:

Thursday, April 29: Lumber Knight and Benjamin Franklin: Dinosaur Hunter; 7:30pm

By now you've heard of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (and if you haven't, you should check out this podcast) but chances are you're unfamiliar with the Ben Franklin who traveled through space and time slaying fearsome dinos with his lightning rods. No matter, you'll catch on quickly enough at ImprovBoston's performance. It's a double feature; the audience will also be treated to the tale of the gallant Lumberknight, who takes on an imposing army of Canadian separatists to save his one true love, the Prime Minister's daughter. (Don't worry, the site's blurbage says the play has been translated into English from the original Canadian.)

Thursday, April 29: "Blowing the Hatch!: Lost Scenes from TV's LOST;" 9pm 

This one's for all of us who have been kept awake, night after night, plagued by the many ellipses and question marks that make up an episode of Lost. You'll sleep tight after this performance, a half-hour long sketch that, according to actor Bryce Read's facebook, promises to 'have all the answers to Lost's deepest mysteries.' All of them. Like, how come Hurley can't seem to drop a single pound, despite the fact that he's been running around whilst sweating profusely on a deserted island with limited food supplies for six full seasons? Please explain. "Blowing the Hatch!" will perhaps answer this question (and many more), as they act out scenes from Lost's cutting-room floor.

Friday, April 30: Ninja Sex Party; 9:30pm

We know, we know, the title says it all. But allow us to elaborate anyway. This musical sketch comedy features two dudes. One wears a ninja constume and plays the piano. The other will be wearing a unitard and doing pretty much everything else ... whatever that is. See you there.

Saturday, May 1: Ethan Gilsdorf, Epic Adventure, Paper Dolls and Dice of Doom; 7:30pm

Ethan Gilsdorf (whose last name sounds like it should belong to, say, an orc-slaying dwarf straight out of Tolkien's Middle-Earth) is the scribe behind Fantasy Freaks and Gaming Geeks and this fest's resident D&D authority. He'll take wide-eyed fans on a wild ride through his life as a gamer, in the form of a visual presentation complete with costumed monologues. ImprovBoston's website touts the experience as "Lord of the Rings [aha!] meets Jack Kerouac's On the Road." Enough said? Enough said.

Saturday, May 1: Overthinking It and Mosaic; 8:30pm

Overthinking It contributors have dedicated themselves to giving pop culture a "level of scrutiny it probably doesn't deserve." They, and improv group Mosaic, will be bringing you said scrutiny, in living color, to the studio at ImprovBoston. The folks behind such breaking news as the inexplicably terrible font chosen for Avatar's promotional posters will be on hand to shine the harsh light of truth on American culture. If you have spent even a single second pondering the continuity problems of Glee, or the role of foreign policy in the 1994 Street Fighter movie, or whether Stand and Deliver's Jaime Escalante could teach calculus to a Kraken, do not miss this.