Will Smith dies, Obama quits, Madonna fesses up: Spam headlines of the week!

Published Jul 08 2008, 10:12 AM by Carly Carioli

You've got to hand it to spam. Having run out of ways to say "get a bigger dick!" without tripping junk-mail detection systems that are tighter than the Pentagon, the creative minds assaulting our email boxes have resorted to some fantastic new tactics. Two months ago, the big trend was insults: "You look really stupid in this picture, ccarioli!" was a popular one -- although, admittedly, a couple of those turned out to be from our moms. This month, however, spam has moved into territory that's near and dear to our journalistic heart: SERIAL FABRICATION! Here's what we saw when we opened our inbox this morning:

xxxxxxx@maicc.be

Will Smith found dead in bathtub [ISO-8859-1]

7/07/2008 11:50 pm

xxxxxxxx@maleylaw.com

Obama bows out of presidential race [ISO-8859-1]

7/08/2008 4:30 am

xxxxxxx@glgroup.com

Madonna admits to affair [ISO-8859-1]

7/08/2008 5:06 am

xxxxxxxxx@vjtanks.com

Yahoo agrees to Microsoft merger deal [ISO-8859-1]

7/08/2008 9:29 am

Admittedly, the first two should've been dead giveaways, but -- sigh -- we actually did a couple doubletakes at the bottom two. Damn you, spam! Not only do you clog the arteries of our modern communication enterprise -- but now you're also tempting us with visions of a stranger, more interesting world than our own!

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Will Smith dies, Obama quits, Madonna fesses up: Spam headlines of the week!

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