Giles is one tough cookie

Plus economic outrage, the clueless Pope, and listening to 'The Angry Man'
By PHILLIPE AND JORGE  |  March 25, 2009

Phillipe and Jorge could not be more pleased to hear that President Barack Obama has nominated Cynthia Giles, the director of Rhode Island's branch of the Conservation Law Founda-tion, to be the new head of enforcement for the US Environmental Protection Agency. To say that this is an inspired choice is a gross understatement.

P+J have had the privilege of working with Cynthia for years and, if being intelligent, tough, and humorous are necessary requirements for the post, she's the gal. Cynthia has been a thorn in the side of people in Rhode Island who have attempted to screw the pooch on environmental issues, but has the full respect of all who have gone head-to-head with her. She has also had no qualms about busting our balls in public, which we find immensely entertaining. (Your day will come, sweetheart.)

Rhode Island's loss will be the country's gain, a sentiment that has literally (and we know what that word means) been expressed to your superior correspondents by almost everyone we know when they heard the news. It is a tribute to Cynthia's hard work and integrity that she would be recognized by our new president.

You definitely do not want to be messing with the EPA from here on in, folks. Send us a postcard from DC, Ms. Giles — we loves ya.

DOING THE WRONG THING
There is a rather inelegant phrase used by P+J's golfing pals when a ball is hooked into the woods on the 18th hole of a tied match or a two-foot near-gimme putt is blown in the same circumstances. It's called "shitting the bed." And that's what Barack Obama has done with his entire bailout plan.

It is beyond aggravating and insulting to have clowns like tax-evading Timothy Geithner and two-faced Wall Street prostitute Larry Summers lecturing the American public about why our tax dollars are being given with virtually no accountability to the thieves of AIG, Goldman Sachs, and Bank of America. Oh, they are "too big to fail." Right.

What also infuriates P+J is how our Congressional delegation has raised barely a whimper about this hosing of US citizens. The people responsible for this mess should be in jail — or worse — not in the position of having government officials begging them to give back their bonuses.

If you want to see some money flying back into the government's hands from our masters of the universes, do what Rep. Barney Frank is suggesting and print the names and addresses of everyone who got one cent of a bonus in the mass media. P+J have a feeling that there might be a real epiphany if that occurred.

And Jack, Sheldon, Patrick, and Jim — where, as Bob Dole once asked, is the outrage?

TROJAN HORSE CRAP
Holy infallible ignorance, Batman!

Just when the polls are showing people turning away from religion in hordes, Pope Benny XVI decides it is time to claim that condoms do not prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS. And guns don't kill people, people kill people. This was prior to Mr. Twinkly Red Shoes going to Africa, where deaths from the disease are at horrifying levels.

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